This topic is near and dear to my heart, too, bballgirl. Thanks for sharing. I struggle with it at various times, but at the core of me I "get it" and embrace The Law of Detachment.
It's a broad concept to discuss.
I resonated with the article you shared. I am both attached and detached from my husband. I love him like no other human being on this earth. I am enamored by him, actually. If I think of losing him for whatever reason, I experience that throat clutch that can only come from grief -- and that's just from the mere thought of losing him. That's my human side, super attached. But, at the same time, I offer him (and me) freedom while I practice "detachment." I know at the core of myself that this won't last forever (nothing does). I am appreciating our love now, and every "now" we get. It's a deep appreciation based on the knowledge it will end some day. Somehow. I don't expect him to be responsible for my happiness and my well being. That's always up to me. Always.
On the topic of dying/death, I think here in the States, especially, we avoid the "death of things." Other countries celebrate death and they face it head-on. Dare I say, they are happier beings for it (while they are alive).
All things die. All moments end.
Knowing that is not meant to be a depressing thing, but, rather, quite contradictory, knowing that brings deep joy to the now somehow. It's amazing, really.
It’s important at this point to mention that you can be in a relationship and appreciate your partner for who they are, enjoy objects without needing them to be happy, and seek new promotions or positions without depending on them for your self-worth. And that’s the point we want to get to: that’s living with the spirit of non-attachment.
I will put the Law of Detachment into effect by making a commitment to take the following steps:
1. Today I will commit myself to detachment. I will allow myself and those around me the freedom to be as they are. I will not rigidly impose my idea of how things should be. I will not force solutions on problems, thereby creating new problems. I will participate in everything with detached involvement.
2. Today I will factor in uncertainty as an essential ingredient of my experience. In my willingness to accept uncertainty, solutions will spontaneously emerge out of the problem, out of the confusion, disorder, and chaos. The more uncertain things seem to be, the more secure I will feel, because uncertainty is my path to freedom. Through the wisdom of uncertainty, I will find my security.
3. I will step into the field of all possibilities and anticipate the excitement that can occur when I remain open to an infinity of choices. When I step into the field of all possibilities, I will experience all the fun, adventure, magic, and mystery of life.
Those who feel lovable, who love, and who experience belonging simply believe they are worthy of love and belonging. - Brene Brown
worksforme2: hey nancyb, how are things perkolating with the older gentleman you spoke of a while back?
Jul 28, 2018 18:25:32 GMT -5
nancyb: worksforme2: Relationship died when we had a difference in opinion regarding UFO's and extraterrestrial beings. LOL I weighed in on the nay side and he believed they walk amongst us.
Jul 30, 2018 5:51:07 GMT -5
bc: I can’t stop laughing...go ahead, micromanage and analyze that marriage and see what she will do for you.
Jul 30, 2018 8:17:58 GMT -5
Dan: I think I'd have to see how good a new girlfriend was in the sack before I crossed her off the list -- or kicked her out of bed -- for believing in UFOs. I guess that makes me... male!
Jul 30, 2018 21:25:05 GMT -5
solodriver: It's been so long for me, I might see UFOs my first time. lol
Jul 31, 2018 1:42:47 GMT -5
beachguy: nancyb: He's right. It's all in the X Files, if you care to look.
Jul 31, 2018 3:45:13 GMT -5
nancyb: Dan: It was a tough decision, he was a good lover but the craziness ended things. Been dating since but nothing serious. I paint a lot.
Jul 31, 2018 5:57:00 GMT -5
petrushka: Thing is, someone being a fruit-loop about something like UFOs usually is not confined to one area; even if it is not immediately obvious. People who are nutty about one thing can go off at a tangent any time, I found (...out the hard way).
Jul 31, 2018 7:39:29 GMT -5
greatcoastal: nancyb: Sounds like you Identified a Fucking Object for what it truly is!
Jul 31, 2018 8:25:25 GMT -5
worksforme2: nancyb,...I am going to paint my living room soon as I can decide on the color.
Jul 31, 2018 19:15:08 GMT -5
worksforme2: When it comes to UFO's we always hear about "little green men", why are there never any "little green women"?
Aug 1, 2018 6:21:15 GMT -5
solodriver: I think I recall an episode of "Lost In Space where Dr. Smith was being chased by a green woman
Aug 1, 2018 21:29:17 GMT -5