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Post by northstarmom on Mar 16, 2018 6:00:05 GMT -5
Well worth reading the whole article: “Abuse doesn’t always manifest as a black eye or a bloody wound. The effects of psychological abuse are just as damaging. I entered counseling and was diagnosed with depression, anxiety, andPTSD. The psychological abuse kept me fearful, the depression and anxiety left me incapable of taking the steps necessary to get out. Although I initially thought PTSD was a bit extreme, it’s been almost three years and certain noises or situations still trigger difficult memories for me. When my male boss was angry and yelling at the staff one day, I became physically sick. I felt like I was right back where I was years ago, sitting and cowering on the garage floor, trying to placate the anger of a man towering over me. I worry that not only have my daughters witnessed a man mistreat a woman, but that my sons have had a poor example to follow of what it means to be a real man. I stayed for the sake of my children. Now, I blame myself for the effects staying may possibly have on them.” Why did I stay? I stayed because I was isolated; I was financially dependent on him; I was sleep deprived; I was told and I believed I was worthless; I was worn down from constantly being on guard for the next attack.” www.ptsdjournal.com/posts/you-can-get-ptsd-from-staying-in-an-emotionally-abusive-relationship/
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Post by baza on Mar 16, 2018 23:34:54 GMT -5
The full article is very sobering stuff. A sordid tale of physical and mental abuse, how it sneaks up on you, how it eventually overpowers you as your physical, emotional and financial autonomy is stripped away. Hardly perceptible early on, but slowly accelerating, insidiously becoming "normal".
And, lest you be thinking that - "at least he doesn't hit me" - take note that abuse need not involve copping a left hook to the head. The mental abuse is just as bad, just as damaging as if there was a physical element to it. PTSD as a result of it ? Yeah, I believe that, in fact I'd be more surprised if victim did NOT end up really fucked over mentally by the process.
In my jurisdiction domestic abuse is a blight on society.
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Post by theexplorer on Mar 27, 2018 18:36:17 GMT -5
Emotionally abusive relationships can unquestionably mess a person up. The damage may be internal, but it is VERY, VERY real!
One of my family members has PTSD, so I have researched the subject. I'm NOT an expert, but know more about the subject than many people. I am skeptical about this author's claim that emotional abuse caused PTSD. PTSD is a very serious disorder. There is a whole family of disorders which are very similar to PTSD. Some of these disorders can be caused by an abusive relationship. The symptoms, and the treatment, would be very similar.
PTSD is typically caused by a life threating experience. Life threating is the KEY. Death must be imminent! If you, or someone close to you, is staring death in the face, PTSD can be the result. Extreme violence, such as military combat; Natural disasters where people are dying next to you; severe accidents and other life threating experiences are the typical triggers of PTSD. Rape and severe childhood abuse can also cause PTSD.
The author of this article could very well have PTSD. I'm NOT questioning her diagnosis. Based on what is written in this article, I would question if her PTSD came from her abusive relationship. An abusive relationship could cause PTSD, if she believed her husband was going to kill her. For instance, if he was brandishing a weapon and threatening to kill her, she could easily get PTSD. It would only take one severe fight, where she thought her death was imminent, during the relationship to trigger PTSD. In such a case, the fight triggered the PTSD, not the relationship. Likewise, if she experienced a severe car accident or natural disaster during her relationship, she could have PTSD from that incident. On the other hand, the author of this article could have PTSD from childhood abuse. In fact, she may not even be able to remember the abuse, but she could still have PTSD as a result. PTSD can go into a "remission" like state, sometimes for many years. If she was severely abused as a child, she may have contracted PTSD. Later, it may have gone into "remission", only to return due to her abusive relationship.
It is also possible that the author was misdiagnosed. She may not have PTSD, but have one of the other disorders that closely resembles PTSD. Some of these other disorders can mimic PTSD quite closely.
Please understand, I am NOT trying to minimize the damage that is done by abusive relationships. Prolonged abuse, even relatively mild abuse, over a period of time can have devastating consequences. It can destroy a person. Emotional abuse can be an incredibly powerful weapon. It can seriously mess up a person! The author of this article could have been profoundly damaged by her relationship. And, as previously stated, she could very possibly have PTSD. I only question if PTSD is a direct result of an abusive relationship. It absolutely could be an indirect result though!
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Post by surfergirl on Mar 28, 2018 8:35:52 GMT -5
"The Body Keeps Score" is THE book on the subject of C-PTSD, in which the "C" stands for complex.
There is a movement for C-PTSD to be included in the DSM, but it is not there yet. Basically, instead of a one time traumatic event, it is a series of traumas that add up to the PTSD symptoms. For example, instead of a house fire, a series of "small" traumatic events, like childhood beatings where there is a loss of control and constant feeling of hopelessness.....
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Post by northstarmom on Mar 28, 2018 13:54:48 GMT -5
When I was 13, my father threatened to kill my mom, my brother and me. He did not brandish a weapon but I knew he had a gun.
For months, I had ptsd symptoms including insomnia, nightmares and uncontrolled trembling. I have no doubt verbal abuse can lead to ptsd.
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Post by Caris on Mar 29, 2018 7:13:03 GMT -5
I am in therapy for PTSD. Apparently, I’ve had it since I was very young, although I didn’t know, and had never heard about it back then, but speaking with my therapist about past experiences explains the reactions I had during certain situations. The Strange thing is I was still a fully functional human being, despite the physical and mental beatings of my childhood. I was wracked with insecurities, and was terrified of tall people in authority. I literally physically shrunk, and backed away from them, not even aware of what I was doing, until I backed into a wall, and only then consciously realized what was happening. Upon becoming aware of my body’s reaction, my thoughts were, “he won’t hit me,” he won’t hit me.” It’s my boss, and although he’s tall, authoritarian, and looks mean, bosses don’t hit employees. He’s not my parent, and yet my body/nervous system was triggered (a word not used in those days) to shrink and recoil from an anticipated blow.
Of course, I wasn’t aware of all this back then, and I had no therapist (therapists were only for crazy Americans, in those days), but regardless, I was able to survive alone, despite many traumatic experiences that were to be visited upon me as I grew into adulthood. However, the SM of 25-years, and the mental games and rejection were too much for my already damaged psyche. Even though in the first 20-years or so, I was still fully functional...but more traumatic experiences yet to be visited upon me were the straw that broke the camel’s back, and I had a full break-down in my late 50s. I have never been the same since. It has taken years to get to where I am today, even though I somehow found the inner strength to get through the divorce, move myself almost 2,000 Miles, and start over in a new city and state, not knowing a soul, except for one person. Once that was done, and the adrenaline which had kept me going subsided, I was burnt out. I was going to say totally burnt out, every which way, but I guess there was still a flicker of light because I’m doing better today than I was almost 3-years ago. I can leave the house now. I recently started socializing (in limited doses), and my next goal is to drive an hour away from home by myself without having a panic attack. I lost my functionality to a great degree. I even went to a job shop (or whatever they call it here) this week. My head swims even thinking about going back to work. When I say “swims,” I mean it’s a real physical effect, where I can no longer think straight, and my heart races...I suppose an anxiety attack...but I have strategies to minimize the triggers now, and I’m facing one fear at a time.
I’m 2-years away from retirement, and it’s daunting to go back into the mainstream of life, when I’ve been away for so long, living a reclusive lifestyle (about 7-years now) because I’d lost hope, and my mind stopped functioning properly (and that was terrifying), as in it would almost shut down at the slightest stress, but even that is better than it was, and I am determined to face the irrational fears, one step at a time, and reclaim my functionality, no matter how long it takes.
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Post by Caris on Mar 29, 2018 11:04:57 GMT -5
"The Body Keeps Score" is THE book on the subject of C-PTSD, in which the "C" stands for complex. There is a movement for C-PTSD to be included in the DSM, but it is not there yet. Basically, instead of a one time traumatic event, it is a series of traumas that add up to the PTSD symptoms. For example, instead of a house fire, a series of "small" traumatic events, like childhood beatings where there is a loss of control and constant feeling of hopelessness..... You are right. My therapist diagnosed me with C-PTSD, but had to file it as PTSD because it’s not in the DSM yet. It was a series of abuses and terrible events on top of the abuse, over a lifetime, that eventually brought me to my knees. I’d been brought to my knees many times, but I always managed to get back up, but the breakdown had me flat out, so just getting to my knees again took a long time. I’m in the process of getting back on my feet, but the death of my husband and brother knocked me back a bit, but I’m doing better now.
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Post by theexplorer on Apr 4, 2018 17:13:32 GMT -5
"The Body Keeps Score" is THE book on the subject of C-PTSD, in which the "C" stands for complex. There is a movement for C-PTSD to be included in the DSM, but it is not there yet. Basically, instead of a one time traumatic event, it is a series of traumas that add up to the PTSD symptoms. For example, instead of a house fire, a series of "small" traumatic events, like childhood beatings where there is a loss of control and constant feeling of hopelessness.....
Yes, you are correct about C-PTSD. In my previous post, I was going strictly by the current definition of PTSD. As you stated, it may be that C-PTSD will be included in the future. Perhaps C-PTSD will be given some other name? Only time will tell.
My Uncle had PTSD from military combat. I learned most of what I know about the subject from him. (He has since passed away from cancer.) His PTSD affected his life profoundly!!! He was only in combat for a fairly short period of time, but it affected him for the rest of his life.
Long term trauma can profoundly mess a person up!!! I'm not knowledgeable enough, at the current time, to have an opinion on C-PTSD. The book you recommended sounds like a highly interesting book. I will definitely read it!
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Post by saarinista on Apr 4, 2018 23:44:11 GMT -5
You can also get secondary PTSD from living with someone who has PTSD, though I'm not sure that's in the DSM, either.
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