jetcity
Junior Member
Searching for an answer
Posts: 62
Age Range: 51-55
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Post by jetcity on Dec 9, 2017 21:04:58 GMT -5
I see you’ve had “the talk” with your partner, good for you. I have yet to do that. I know exactly what you mean about time going bye, one day you wake up and think, it’s been X# of years since we made love and I REALLY miss it. Like you, I love my wife (partner) but they have a physical issue . I have begun to wish I could just turn that part of me off but I can’t. Looks like I joined this group a couple hours before you did. I hope you find some answers here, I’m going to be doing a lot of reading in the next couple days. Good luck.
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Post by h on Dec 9, 2017 21:17:55 GMT -5
Welcome jan70 and I'm sorry you found yourself in this situation. It's good that he is going to a doctor to check out the problem. You should go with him as a show of support and also another person to ask questions if he forgets or take notes on treatment options. That is encouraging. What has me worried for you is the fact that this isn't a recent problem. If he has never shown much interest in sex, either he has had a medical issue for that whole time, or he has just never had much of a libido. The length of time this has been going on is also troublesome. After that long going without, a person can get used to it and then it becomes the new normal. That makes it more difficult to turn it back on.
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Post by baza on Dec 12, 2017 19:33:21 GMT -5
It reads like the sexual aspects of your deal were way below par from the get go, and then got even worse.
It also reads like he was (and is) perfectly happy with that situation.
What would be his motive to want to change what has thus far served him so well ? If the boot was on the other foot (ie it was you who was perfectly happy with your relationship as it is) would you be very enthusiastic about radically changing the situation ? Or would you be more inclined to just pay lip service to proposed change and maintain the situation just as it is for as long as you could ?
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