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Post by northstarmom on May 19, 2019 21:45:03 GMT -5
Just for fun, I tried starfish sex with post SM lover. It was super hot. No matter how much I tried to stay still and quiet, he managed to find a way to make me wiggle, cum and moan.
Trust me: If your wife or woman is doing starfish sex (or if your man is doing what my husband did in our rare sexual encounters -- roll over and poke her sex), they are not sexually attracted to you. Someone who is can't lay there like a starfish or stone.
Wish I'd known this when I was married.
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Post by ironhamster on May 20, 2019 3:35:27 GMT -5
OMG! northstarmom, I have such an image of you as a no nonsense woman, that your revelation contrasts in a most comical way. Thank you for sharing.
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Post by baza on May 20, 2019 4:13:54 GMT -5
I would endorse that. Whereas I have not actually tried to "just lie there", I have had a few experiences with Ms enna where I didn't particularly feel like a root, but "went along with it" initially. She seems to have the knack of of turning "going along with it" to full blooded involvement.
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Post by northstarmom on May 20, 2019 7:57:00 GMT -5
Just making sure that no one missed the implication that the fun of starfish sex is (as Baz’s story implied) trying to be quiet and still while someone does their best to turn you on. If post sm partner had just stuck his dick in and gotten off not only would that have hurt since I would have been dry but also it wouldn’t have been a turn on.
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Post by hopingforachange on May 20, 2019 12:30:50 GMT -5
Just for fun, I tried starfish sex with post SM lover. It was super hot. No matter how much I tried to stay still and quiet, he managed to find a way to make me wiggle, cum and moan. Trust me: If your wife or woman is doing starfish sex (or if your man is doing what my husband did in our rare sexual encounters -- roll over nad poke her sex), they are not sexually attracted to you. Someone who is can't lay there like a starfish or stone. Wish I'd known this when I was married. Sounds like next time he needs a few straps to ensure compliance.
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Post by northstarmom on May 20, 2019 12:45:06 GMT -5
Iron hamster said: “OMG! northstarmom, I have such an image of you as a no nonsense woman, that your revelation contrasts in a most comical way. ”
I’m a sensual slut in the bedroom. My writing is far more no nonsense than I am in person.
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Post by northstarmom on May 20, 2019 12:46:23 GMT -5
Hopingforchange said: “Sounds like next time he needs a few straps to ensure compliance.”
Light spanks make me work harder to comply and also make me super hot.
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Post by greatcoastal on May 20, 2019 12:50:32 GMT -5
Just for fun, I tried starfish sex with post SM lover. It was super hot. No matter how much I tried to stay still and quiet, he managed to find a way to make me wiggle, cum and moan. Trust me: If your wife or woman is doing starfish sex (or if your man is doing what my husband did in our rare sexual encounters -- roll over nad poke her sex), they are not sexually attracted to you. Someone who is can't lay there like a starfish or stone. Wish I'd known this when I was married. Sounds like next time he needs a few straps to ensure compliance. Actually straps make you even more aware to all the other "clues" that your partner gives, proving how much they enjoy having sex with you Their is also the issue of " the kids will hear us" making 'communication' all the more important. Starfish sex lacks all of that. Instead it communicates, " get it over with, it doesn't matter, it's not that important".
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Post by northstarmom on May 20, 2019 12:56:34 GMT -5
Yes, GC. You are correct. What I described isn’t the starfish sex in a SM. It’s attempted starfish sex done by a partner who enjoys being turned on and teased by you.
The straps sound like fun.
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Post by WindSister on May 25, 2019 11:04:45 GMT -5
I concur. It really can't happen (starfish sex) when you are truly into each other. We have had a bit of a dry spell lately since the fire..... dry for me is once a week, I guess, lol.... but when we do have sex, there's nothing starfish about it. When we finally get alone time Monday it will be a week of no sex because of my work trip and this long holiday weekend of family all around. I plan on ravishing him. I just want more alone time again.
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Post by elkclan2 on May 31, 2019 16:06:41 GMT -5
All this talk about starfish sex - sometimes my guy just sort of 'over-pleasures' me and I stop being fully functional. And then I feel guilty... He says I shouldn't worry, that he likes that I'm zoned from sex. So I guess there's starfish sex and then there's starfish sex.
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Post by Handy on May 31, 2019 16:35:16 GMT -5
elkclan2, to me starfish sex is the partner does little but attend the session, no activity or reactions on their part. If you react to the point od zoning out, then that is a reaction to good sex. Your man can tell something good is or has happened. With starfish sex there is no reaction and the partner putting in the effort to try to make the sex good doesn't see much of a reaction based on his or her efforts.
Maybe sex is similar to giving a person a birthday present. A flat affect "thank you" pales in comparison to happy response and an ecstatic response from the receiver. A flat "thank you" could be just a polite response but when the receiver gets excited, you know you did something special.
Most people like to feel they did a good job. When you zone out I am guessing your partner knows he did a good job AND you appreciate the sexual experience.
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Post by hopingforachange on May 31, 2019 20:28:56 GMT -5
All this talk about starfish sex - sometimes my guy just sort of 'over-pleasures' me and I stop being fully functional. And then I feel guilty... He says I shouldn't worry, that he likes that I'm zoned from sex. So I guess there's starfish sex and then there's starfish sex. If we made you go brain dead, then we know we did it right.
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Post by shamwow on Jun 2, 2019 8:08:41 GMT -5
Just to clarify, starfish sex is when your partner just lies there and acts as a compliant blow up doll, right? What if they do participate? You know. Give off a bored sigh. Whisper in your such sweet nothings as "are you almost done"? I would argue that this type of "participation" makes the experience all the more star-fishy and northstarmom should incorporate this into her experimentation.
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Post by isthisit on Jun 2, 2019 8:32:52 GMT -5
Just to clarify, starfish sex is when your partner just lies there and acts as a compliant blow up doll, right? What if they do participate? You know. Give off a bored sigh. Whisper in your such sweet nothings as "are you almost done"? I would argue that this type of "participation" makes the experience all the more star-fishy and northstarmom should incorporate this into her experimentation. ROFLMAO
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