firefollower
Full Member
Only you can prevent forest fires
Posts: 154
Age Range: 51-55
|
Post by firefollower on May 30, 2019 11:23:21 GMT -5
Today’s Question: This is a question I’ve been discussing a lot with a friend. I thought I’d throw it out to you for your feedback. This one is tricky because you need to define what “joy” means to you: What moments in your adult life brought you true joy? Definitely my children when they became little people and could think on their own Walking through the woods on a nice summer day
|
|
|
Post by h on May 30, 2019 13:07:01 GMT -5
Today’s Question: This is a question I’ve been discussing a lot with a friend. I thought I’d throw it out to you for your feedback. This one is tricky because you need to define what “joy” means to you: What moments in your adult life brought you true joy? I think true joy is an undefinable thing. It's one of those things that you know what it is when you feel it, but can't put words to it. The only time I have ever felt true joy as an adult was on my wedding day when I felt like my whole life was on the upswing. I felt like I had finally taken that big leap into a much more fulfilling existence. Ignorance is bliss... Since that day, I have never felt true joy again. There have been brief blips of mediocre temporary happiness, but never really true joy.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on May 30, 2019 15:39:57 GMT -5
I have this crystal clear memory, just a moment from about 2002. We lived on 30 acres in Oregon wine country and our kids were 5,4,2. The lower pasture had all of these daisy-like flowers that were blooming and my wife and I were sitting in the grass surrounded by flowers while our three kids played, laughed and threw rocks in the pond. Finest moment of my life.
The feeling I had in those seconds is my definition of Joy. I've had others but that one is definitive.
|
|
|
Post by isthisit on May 30, 2019 15:54:08 GMT -5
Today’s Question: This is a question I’ve been discussing a lot with a friend. I thought I’d throw it out to you for your feedback. This one is tricky because you need to define what “joy” means to you: What moments in your adult life brought you true joy? Another great question sadkat . True joy in my life has been derived from my occupation and my family. At work I have had the privilege to share moments of acute joy with people in my care and some of these moments will stay with me to the grave. However, for moments of exquisite and concentrated joy it has to be the first skin to skin cuddles with my much longed for newborns. There's no feeling like it. Being honest, on a par with this was that wonderful moment when I arrived at the ancient church on my dad's arm and looked down the flower filled aisle to see the love of my life waiting to marry me. The sunshine sparkled through the stained glass window, the sound of the organ filled the church and I simply could not have been happier.
|
|
|
Post by sadkat on May 30, 2019 21:28:05 GMT -5
Today’s Question: This is a question I’ve been discussing a lot with a friend. I thought I’d throw it out to you for your feedback. This one is tricky because you need to define what “joy” means to you: What moments in your adult life brought you true joy? I think true joy is an undefinable thing. It's one of those things that you know what it is when you feel it, but can't put words to it. The only time I have ever felt true joy as an adult was on my wedding day when I felt like my whole life was on the upswing. I felt like I had finally taken that big leap into a much more fulfilling existence. Ignorance is bliss... Since that day, I have never felt true joy again. There have been brief blips of mediocre temporary happiness, but never really true joy. I’m so sorry about this h. I hope the future holds some moments of joy for you.
|
|
|
Post by h on May 31, 2019 9:07:17 GMT -5
I think true joy is an undefinable thing. It's one of those things that you know what it is when you feel it, but can't put words to it. The only time I have ever felt true joy as an adult was on my wedding day when I felt like my whole life was on the upswing. I felt like I had finally taken that big leap into a much more fulfilling existence. Ignorance is bliss... Since that day, I have never felt true joy again. There have been brief blips of mediocre temporary happiness, but never really true joy. I’m so sorry about this h . I hope the future holds some moments of joy for you. I'm sure there will be someday. I'm not going to sit around waiting and holding my breath though. Whatever happens, happens. I'm just along for the ride.
|
|
|
Post by Handy on May 31, 2019 13:46:44 GMT -5
I can describe satisfaction and several other emotions. Joy is a bit difficult.
|
|
|
Post by lessingham on Jun 1, 2019 15:00:01 GMT -5
Walking towards Queen Hapshapset's tomb in Egypt. Especially as everyone else took the people carrier. The joy of the perfection of the building and the joy of earning it by walking
|
|
|
Post by northstarmom on Jun 1, 2019 15:55:02 GMT -5
Sitting in a rocking chair In the middle of a quiet, snowy, Saturday Michigan night while holding my sweet sleeping baby. That was joy. The first time I spent the night with post sm lover. I tried to stay awake all night so I could consciously enjoy the bliss of having his arms around me.
|
|
spencer
Junior Member
I welcome chats - just message me
Posts: 50
|
Post by spencer on Jun 1, 2019 16:00:53 GMT -5
I tried to stay awake all night so I could consciously enjoy the bliss of having his arms around me. That sooooo would be me - THAT is what I crave...
|
|
|
Post by warmways on Jun 1, 2019 21:59:51 GMT -5
Me too
|
|
|
Post by sadkat on Jun 3, 2019 9:07:10 GMT -5
This question came up as I was struggling with the idea of responsibility vs doing something that makes you happy. In my opinion, we are responsible for making a good life for ourselves, providing for those who depend on us, and for keeping our promises. Sometimes, this responsibility gets in the way of our ability to find true joy. Looking over my past and reviewing all of your comments, it seems to me that our list of moments where we found true joy as adults is quite small. I’d imagine, if I asked you for a list of things you feel responsible for, that list would be much larger. It begs the question- shouldn’t we be pursuing more opportunities to find joy in our lives? After all, we only have one life to live. This all goes back to the same question that keeps rolling around in my head: if I knew tomorrow was the last day of my life, what would I regret? What would I be grateful for? I think I would be grateful for those moments of great joy. I want to find more opportunity to experience joy in my life moving forward. I’m focusing on that as I implement my exit plan and walk into my unknown future.
|
|
|
Post by Handy on Jun 3, 2019 12:10:39 GMT -5
Sadkat I’d imagine, if I asked you for a list of things you feel responsible for, that list would be much larger.
I have a long "responsible for list."
I look back and see there was little to no room for screw-ups and because resources were very scarce. An analogy would be "how to feed 6 people with food for 4 people, just add water and hope it works.
Also, be prepared for all types of negative things you never thought would happen.
|
|
|
Post by GoldenBubble on Jun 4, 2019 9:13:06 GMT -5
I would regret waiting so long to level up my values.
|
|
|
Post by deadzone75 on Jun 4, 2019 12:50:51 GMT -5
This question came up as I was struggling with the idea of responsibility vs doing something that makes you happy. In my opinion, we are responsible for making a good life for ourselves, providing for those who depend on us, and for keeping our promises. Sometimes, this responsibility gets in the way of our ability to find true joy. Looking over my past and reviewing all of your comments, it seems to me that our list of moments where we found true joy as adults is quite small. I’d imagine, if I asked you for a list of things you feel responsible for, that list would be much larger. It begs the question- shouldn’t we be pursuing more opportunities to find joy in our lives? After all, we only have one life to live. This all goes back to the same question that keeps rolling around in my head: if I knew tomorrow was the last day of my life, what would I regret? What would I be grateful for? I think I would be grateful for those moments of great joy. I want to find more opportunity to experience joy in my life moving forward. I’m focusing on that as I implement my exit plan and walk into my unknown future. Very interesting. I have found that during my SM, especially more recently, I haven't been nearly responsible enough. We don't have kids who depend on us, but I have been terrible with my money. I will spend on anything, just to make me happy. Amazon? Yup. New hobby of collecting things I used to own like worthless VHS tapes? Yup. Buying a shitload of new books even though I have many on my to-read list? Yup. Putting off an oil change to go see a movie on my day off? Yup. Maybe I've just become less responsible in my older years, but I believe it has more to do with the weight of my SM. The pain of no sex is relentless, and we (or at least I) seek out joy in any form, by any means. If you're already miserable, I think you're less likely to act responsibly, because, well...responsible is typically not fun. What's your motivation to act responsibly if you feel like shit all the time? It reminds me of a quote from Shawshank Redemption. "In prison, a man'll do most anything to keep his mind occupied."
|
|