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Post by elkclan2 on Jun 6, 2019 3:21:42 GMT -5
I can't actually think of much that was good about my ex. Except that he is genuinely funny, very dry, sharp wit. He's quite intelligent, but that's wasted on his 'down the rabbit hole' weird, racist, hateful, paranoid politics.
My current partner is also funny, but more in a silly way - a master of the 'Dad' joke. Even though he's super smart.
The only thing I miss about my ex, in relation to my current partner, is that I could serve him many more different foods. Current partner wont eat fish, any kind of sauce, anything pickled (and a range of other things)... but he does eat one thing my ex never did and that makes up for all of it. ;-)
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Post by jim44444 on Jun 7, 2019 6:10:38 GMT -5
Current partner wont eat fish, any kind of sauce, anything pickled (and a range of other things)... but he does eat one thing my ex never did and that makes up for all of it. ;-) LMFAO.
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Post by northstarmom on Jun 7, 2019 6:47:54 GMT -5
Handy said: “ I don't know how accurate the personality profile match was but it suggested only a 5% very good match and maybe something like up to a 20% partial match with women my age so my expectations are sort of low finding that "very good" match. “
Why would you base your odds of finding a compatible partner on a rest that you don’t remember the details of and that is probably bogus?
The main things preventing your finding a match are your marital status and your mindset including establishing relationships in which you fix things for others.
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Post by Handy on Jun 7, 2019 11:54:35 GMT -5
Northstarmom, the 5% very good match idea eliminated the idea that I had that the main problem why others and I didn't connect mentally or emotionally was because I was the odd-ball. The 5% match mostly indicated to me that people vary a great deal and explained why some people posting their dating experiences, why one woman went on 40 dates with men and only wanted to go on a second date with 2 men because she wasn't that interested in the men.
This sort of follows some of Greatcostal's experiences. He wasn't impressed with some of his dates and then he met his current woman and it all changer for the better.
This is why many of my posts have the word "compatibility" in the post.
I know my marital status is a huge issue. Like Baza advises, I have yet to consult a lawyer.
I actually have an escape fund and some money for a sizeable down payment on a place to buy. One issue is in my area prices almost doubled in the past 5 or 10 years so that means my "down payment money" doesn't go as far as it used to.
I am cutting back on the fixing thing. I will admit to my mental concept of how "bad divorce feels" to me as a major problem for me.
Yesterday my W was talking about buying more pots and pans and electronic cook wear. I was thinking to myself, "buy one more f-ing piece of crap and I am out of here." My w does not cook and spends about $300 on stuff advertised on TV or from catalogs she gets in the mail.
NO, I didn't say much except "no more cooking crap you never use."
ME, I just went back to sanding my 11 year old yellowed, headlight covers, then polished them and coated them with UV protectant. The final results on my headlights, they look almost as good as new. New headlights for one car=$120 to $180. My supplies to do 4 pair of headlights $35, so that is a little under $10 per car. Environmentally that is 2 to 4 quarts less of crude oil and a couple of cubic feet less of trash in the landfill.
OH, just remembered, anniversary #51 today. :eye roll:
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Post by northstarmom on Jun 7, 2019 12:26:54 GMT -5
My point, handy, is that the compatibility test probably was bogus, not based on valid research. You don’t even know what the test was yet you are believing its results.
I’ve seen a lot of people — including myself — find compatible mates even though odds were against them. When I say “compatible” I mean mates who obviously adore them despite their having personality quirks or physical defects that would make many people avoid them.
What all had — in addition to being available — were a sense of humor and a belief in themselves as loveable. This includes the friend who is permanently deformed after shooting off much of his face in a suicide attempt. An insensitive nurse suggested that to avoid scaring kids, he should go out in public wearing a baseball cap with a veil. “He’ll, no!” My friend declared. Last month, he married the love of his life, a woman he met after his suicide attempt.
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Post by Handy on Jun 7, 2019 19:50:25 GMT -5
Northstarmom, I know your points are valid. I have read stories of people that found love and happiness in some uncommon situations.
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Post by tirefire on Jun 8, 2019 11:04:00 GMT -5
W is a fierce mama bear when she feels her kids are threatened in any way. She is not a flake. Disorganized and scattered but will always show up (a few minutes late) when it matters. Hard working at her career. Will work very hard at the first 85% of a task. Will stop her car in traffic to help some kid getting bullied (it is invariably just some harmless rough housing -does anyone call it that anymore?)
Thank you for starting this thread. A great idea.
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Post by solodriver on Jun 8, 2019 20:10:08 GMT -5
... but he does eat one thing my ex never did and that makes up for all of it. ;-) For me THAT one thing is one of my basic food groups
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Post by noregretz on Jun 9, 2019 16:13:37 GMT -5
.... I guess so
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