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Post by lost34 on Jun 22, 2016 7:43:57 GMT -5
I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He doesn't even care. I think his happy that we are going our separate ways. No questions about can we try fixing this or how we even got to this situation. His care factor is 0.
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Post by baza on Jun 22, 2016 8:39:08 GMT -5
Personally it was not "a particular" thing that told me enough was enough.
Nor was there a specific notable time that it happened.
I knew where my deal was heading (and I had taken legal advice and had an exit plan in pretty close to do-able status) and was working on a date of January 2010 to have all the ducks lined up.
One innocuous word in one otherwise one innocuous conversation and that was it. I was out. October 2009. 3 months ahead of schedule.
I think, that it is best to be prepared, as relatively minor things can tip things arse up very quickly and very surprisingly.
When opportunity comes a knocking (and it will) then your job is to be ready and pre-prepared.
If you wait for some dramatic one off event to happen as "the" moment, you may wait a loooooong looooong time.
And time is your enemy.
Get prepared would be my suggestion.
The trigger will come.
All you have to do is be in a position where you can pull it.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 22, 2016 9:21:37 GMT -5
I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He doesn't even care. I think his happy that we are going our separate ways. No questions about can we try fixing this or how we even got to this situation. His care factor is 0. Are you sure he doesn't care, or is it perhaps that he just doesn't take you seriously? He may not give a rip about you, but he may like things the way they are. As baza says, be prepared. Once you set things in motion he might put a very different take on it. |
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Post by bballgirl on Jun 22, 2016 9:38:06 GMT -5
Time will tell what his true feelings are. If this is the case it may make things easy to go your separate ways. I really hope you have retained an attorney if there are any assets, child support, etc.
Good luck!
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Post by lost34 on Jun 22, 2016 13:48:33 GMT -5
Thanks everyone for all your suggestions. I know that its right to do it. I'm just so scared.
I don't know what to do first. We have a child a house. I don't want to leave. I still have feelings for him, but I feel like I need to.
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Post by 3000more on Jun 22, 2016 16:47:31 GMT -5
Best time is "when a shit is not given", and when you are prepared.
Sounds to me like a small amount of shit is still given.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 23, 2016 1:48:34 GMT -5
Thanks everyone for all your suggestions. I know that its right to do it. I'm just so scared. I don't know what to do first. We have a child a house. I don't want to leave. I still have feelings for him, but I feel like I need to. What to do first is talk to a lawyer. Don't just pick one out of the phone book. Check their standing with the state bar association for disciplinary actions. If you have divorced friends who can keep their mouth shut, ask them for a referral. Marriage counselors are also good sources of referrals for divorce lawyers. Seriously. Don't pick a lawyer just because they offer a free initial consultation. You're probably going to need a few thousand dollars for this. Quite a few if it ends up in court. One visit isn't going to make much difference in the long run. If you can't afford one visit to a lawyer, the first thing to do is start saving, begging, borrowing, or stealing. Ok, a lawyer would probably advise against the latter. |
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Post by baza on Jun 23, 2016 3:55:48 GMT -5
Gather all the financial information too.
Assets, debts, tax returns etc etc.
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Post by bballgirl on Jun 23, 2016 5:42:36 GMT -5
Open a checking account in your own name. Once you file you will not be able to change or add any accounts. Once he's served he can not make any financial changes.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 23, 2016 13:14:51 GMT -5
I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He doesn't even care. I think his happy that we are going our separate ways. No questions about can we try fixing this or how we even got to this situation. His care factor is 0. His lack of response is hurtful! Sounds like he's moved on already or doesn't take you seriously like other members have mentioned on here. I am so sorry you are going through this. |
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Post by Neotericgal on Jun 29, 2016 13:33:07 GMT -5
Open a checking account in your own name. Once you file you will not be able to change or add any accounts. Once he's served he can not make any financial changes. Really good advice! *adding to my 'to-do list'* |
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Post by greatcoastal on Jun 29, 2016 15:23:30 GMT -5
Look! Twins! Have you two met?
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Post by Neotericgal on Jun 30, 2016 3:28:05 GMT -5
Look! Twins! Have you two met? That took me far longer then a NY minute to figure that out but I finally did!!! :o lol *flexing my arm* |
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Post by samedeepwater on Jun 30, 2016 7:21:12 GMT -5
June 17, 2015. But who's counting?
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Post by greatcoastal on Jun 30, 2016 7:38:33 GMT -5
June 17, 2015. But who's counting? Is everything final yet? |
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