|
Post by ironhamster on Nov 4, 2022 3:29:59 GMT -5
In some states you can have a mediator to help divide the assets. For the money at stake, and what little I know of your husband, I think the cost of your own lawyer would pay for itself. There is a reason why divorces are expensive. It's because they're worth it.
|
|
|
Post by mirrororchid on Nov 4, 2022 6:22:31 GMT -5
He moved his stuff out of our bedroom - moved upstairs - and he said,” it’s obvious we aren’t going to be married anymore. Do you want to do the paperwork or do you want me to?” ...Should i ask him if he wants to share an attorney? Should I wait until holidays are over? Where will I go when I leave? Got some good news here. He's now moving in the same direction you are. (Good news because you've said not even non-sexual issues are a reason to leave. Wistfulness is low.) All you have is inertia, and he's moved forward just a bit. As DryCreek says, definitely your own lawyer. Buuuuuuut..... no need to pay the lawyers any more than absolutely necessary and fighting over possessions/money will jack up the bill. Perhaps Baza's post on Binding Financial Agreements should be dusted off. iliasm.org/thread/5015/binding-financial-agreementiliasm.org/post/109995/threadAnother member, Dan, speaks of a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst. Baza follows up. iliasm.org/thread/4261/why-talk-cdfaYou may also want to start looking at suitable homes. Where do you want to live? How can you make the numbers work? If you have numerous options, would going somewhere cheaper let you let you redeploy funds to something better than everyday expenses? (Travel? Classes? Gym membership? Down payment collection?) That can start right now and shouldn't require any feelings of trepidation from jumping into the pool.
|
|
|
Post by DryCreek on Nov 4, 2022 6:51:05 GMT -5
Good suggestions here to consider other forms of professional help and doc prep.
As reminder, a lawyer’s retainer is just a bucket of money from which they draw their fees - you might need to put more money in if things drag out, but you will also get money back if it doesn’t get consumed.
That said, the hourly rate for a lawyer will be much higher than alternatives, if those are viable for you. Whether this is worthwhile depends on your circumstance; for some, tipping the financial scale just a little could easily justify the cost.
DC
|
|
|
Post by northstarmom on Nov 4, 2022 12:54:26 GMT -5
You need to get moving as many people divorce after the holidays and many people look for therapists during the holidays. Make your appointments now.
|
|