Post by currie94 on Jan 15, 2021 22:25:22 GMT -5
I am a female who’s husband does not want to be intimate with me. We have been married for 9 years. This was always a bit lacking especially since having kids and is always my fault. I am dyyyying! We have two children under age 7. On our honeymoon in Hawaii, I was told “I’m not a college kid” in a super abrupt tone bc I just assumed that in the honeymoon, we would be intimate each night. I am mid forties, and he is early fifties. Don’t think he is crafty or tech savvy enough to have an affair. Also a creature of routine so that would shake things up way too much for him to handle. Have also been told that “women’s bodies change after having children” 3 months postpartum and also that he looks at me as a mom now and “not his hot GF”. That was years ago. Now it’s that “we haven’t been getting along” (even though nothing about that has changed, it’s always been up and down). I can go to him so humbly and nicely to ask and am told that I just push back the time because talking about it doesn’t make him want to. I also know that he releases by looking at porn once on average per week (which he denies but I’m not fool and know what he looks at in private mode). Have said try coming to me instead of that. Always a different excuse. I wouldn’t hate that so much if it didn’t replace me. I just need touch and physical interaction SO BAD! I am way more physically charged than him. Kills my self esteem and confidence and faith in our relationship. All things I have tried to discuss but doesn’t care obviously enough about my feelings to work on it. Feeling so defeated. For the record, I am pretty average! Not overweight but not super fit either. Even when I was really fit having time to go to the gym, it made very little difference to him. I have been married one other time before and not seeing my kids half the time so I am in it to stay. So so sad. Oh and he doesn’t have a medical or testosterone issue. I just think that his drive is naturally low!