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Post by idgaf96 on Mar 3, 2020 16:50:53 GMT -5
I've always been attracted to men about 10-15 years older than me. My husband is 13 years older than me, most the partners I have had even back in high school were at least a decade older than me. My primary partner is 15 years older than me but I also am seeing someone my age and it works ok.
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Post by ironhamster on Mar 3, 2020 19:30:05 GMT -5
When I started looking, I had my mind set on someone post-menopausal. I wanted someone mature and self sufficient, so I knew I was wanted and not needed. Well, the most important things, I found. Age, though, is mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
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Post by lifeinwoodinville on Mar 4, 2020 2:29:54 GMT -5
I have only slept with women younger than I am, it just kinda worked out that way. Anywhere from two to eighteen years younger. i would love to get together with an experienced woman older than I am but I don't see that happening anytime soon.
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Post by carl on Mar 4, 2020 19:27:15 GMT -5
When I started looking, I had my mind set on someone post-menopausal. I wanted someone mature and self sufficient, so I knew I was wanted and not needed. Well, the most important things, I found. Age, though, is mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. I think, like you say, being wanted rather than needed. Someone self sufficient is what allows an attraction to occur.
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Post by carl on Mar 4, 2020 19:41:28 GMT -5
I am in my forties at the moment and in good shape, touch wood. (Not that it helps though). But when I was younger I always liked the idea of women in their forties or there abouts. Even when I was 20 I kind of had an attraction to that age group. And wasn’t quite so taken by younger women. The thing is that I still prefer women in that age group. Shame. I’ve hardly had sex at all with anyone around that age. When I was younger I didn’t have the opportunity to have a relationship with a woman that age for various reasons and now I am married to someone that age she’s not fucking interested. I’ll be an old man next and they’ll be too young. Oh well. Anyway I was interested if anyone else got more turned on by people of a certain age. And has it been so as long as they remember. Carl, you have made my day! I am in my forties and I thought this was a myth. Please tell me where I will find these twentysomething MILF lovers. I am anxious to know. Sure, I will have nothing in common with these gentlemen but, well ... I have friends for conversation. To answer your question, prior to your shattering revelation above, I would have answered somewhere around my own age, but now I see a world of opportunity 😊. I don’t know where to find these type of younger guys who are into women in their forties. I bet they are around though. When I was younger I never got much response from other guys if I mentioned it so I can’t say how common it is. But for me it was/is quite a distinct attraction. Definitely the most exciting sexual fantasy I used to have. Well actually it’s still just a frigging fantasy. Oh well. I guess the best fantasy is one you never fulfil. But when I was twenty it was more than just a sexual fantasy so in reality it would have messed with my mind if something had ever happened. So be careful - don’t want any tears now do we. Lol
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Post by carl on Mar 4, 2020 19:45:07 GMT -5
I also love this thread as a 45 year old woman! Maybe there IS hope! I have never been too concerned with age but recently someone started online flirting with me on a DM on reddit. Not weird in general but he was really flirty really quickly which I usually just shut down. Turned out he was 28. I told him how old I am and shut him down. The thought of being sexy with someone that young is gross, IMO. He called me ageist. Guess I am not a cougar! You say that the thought of being sexy with someone that young is gross - how do you mean ?
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Post by workingonit on Mar 4, 2020 20:18:37 GMT -5
I also love this thread as a 45 year old woman! Maybe there IS hope! I have never been too concerned with age but recently someone started online flirting with me on a DM on reddit. Not weird in general but he was really flirty really quickly which I usually just shut down. Turned out he was 28. I told him how old I am and shut him down. The thought of being sexy with someone that young is gross, IMO. He called me ageist. Guess I am not a cougar! You say that the thought of being sexy with someone that young is gross - how do you mean ? I have worked with lots of kids/young adults and I have very close friends with kids in their mid-late twenties. While I have good relationships with these individuals I guess being a parent/teacher/auntie/mentor to people of that age establishes a boundary that is pretty clear in my mind. I could never have sex with someone my children's age, for example. That will always feel wrong to me, I think. Perhaps if I did not have kids or did not have close relationships that are clearly defined with members of that age group I would feel differently. I do have a friend that dated a 21 year old when she was 42. Different strokes for different folks I suppose.
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Post by lessingham on Mar 5, 2020 3:37:12 GMT -5
I remember Bill Wyman talking aboit his younger wife, she was in her teens when they met? He mused that he would be in the house chatting with the titans of 60s music and she had no idea who they were. Similarly, he struggled to place her pop icons. Age differences can throw up huge culture divides.
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Post by carl on Mar 5, 2020 14:20:09 GMT -5
@workingonit so you would find a younger guy an unnatural choice. And I sense you wouldn’t find them very flattering either. I’d say in my opinion that’s fairly typical. If old fashioned. it’s odd how I could date a woman twenty years younger than me and maybe nobody would think anything of it but the other way round and people aren’t comfortable. So is there an age of person you ARE attracted to ?
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Post by bozodeclowne on Mar 5, 2020 16:18:07 GMT -5
35 was always it for me, even as a teen, and I did have a couple of encounters with women in that range. So, I was attracted to "older" women. After reaching that age and beyond, I was suddenly into "younger" women! I'm early 50s now, and I think maybe 10yrs younger would be my limit were I on the market again. I have children that are now in their early 20s, and while I can appreciate the clear skin and healthy bodies of their friends, I don't have any attraction to them. 35 is still it in my dreams.
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Post by workingonit on Mar 5, 2020 20:26:41 GMT -5
@workingonit so you would find a younger guy an unnatural choice. And I sense you wouldn’t find them very flattering either. I’d say in my opinion that’s fairly typical. If old fashioned. it’s odd how I could date a woman twenty years younger than me and maybe nobody would think anything of it but the other way round and people aren’t comfortable. So is there an age of person you ARE attracted to ? I find lots of people attractive! I would say in terms of dating 10 years give or take in either direction would be fine. Though I have seen some very fine men over 60 that I would also be into. Maybe at least over 30? IDK. I don't have a hard and fast rule except nobody in their 20s or younger!
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Post by nyctos on Mar 7, 2020 8:27:39 GMT -5
Attracted to? Many ages. I'm not sure my attraction is any more than a source of pain for me anymore, though. Maybe that's all it ever was.
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Post by greatcoastal on Mar 7, 2020 15:35:36 GMT -5
I went through a lot of rebuilding and discovering, during and after my divorce. A BIG factor in who I was going to be attracted to? went back to my realization that I was too codependent and someone else had to find me attractive first! (I was not going to do that anymore)
So...I set myself some boundaries!
I went through a brief period of needing to be sexually desired by another woman, but not just any woman, someone close to my own age was a good, bar-level for my rebuilding! I figured we would have much in common and similar stories. For me, that's the way things turned out!
Now I want /need more than just-being desired- I learned I wanted another shot at a strong, long term relationship. So, things like...
Are you employed? Married? Single? divorced? Children? No children? Grand children? Live with your parents? Own your own place? Live close by? Do you have a high sex drive? etc... Then I would consider ,if our age difference was going to be a factor.
My current woman and I are 6 yrs apart. Her 50 and me 56.
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Post by rdp62 on Mar 8, 2020 16:04:24 GMT -5
Has never been about age or even looks to an extent I think everyone is attractive in some way. Have you ever noticed some people get more attractive or not the more you know them? The internet is a little test like have you ever cared about someone you have never met or even seen? I have ...
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Post by Handy on Mar 8, 2020 17:18:40 GMT -5
Rdp62 ..... have you ever cared about someone you have never met or even seen? I have ...
I have to admit I cared about several women on forums like this one but I never said much about my personal feelings. I just thought, "what was good for the individual" and replied in that manner.
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