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Post by padgemi on Jan 12, 2020 21:27:21 GMT -5
Update: still waiting...😶
30 days are up 2/7. Of course, my mentor/XSIL predicts they will file an extension and start a new clock...
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Post by sadkat on Jan 12, 2020 22:39:48 GMT -5
Thanks for the update padgemi. It’s likely they will try to drag this out more. It only benefits the lawyer, though. It’s a shame w can’t see that. Hang In there! |
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grower
Junior Member
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Post by grower on Jan 13, 2020 10:35:07 GMT -5
Good luck, your situation make me appreciate the crap
I have, I'm keeping my fingers crossed for uncontested D
and 50/50 on my son.
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Post by saarinista on Jan 13, 2020 15:41:27 GMT -5
Padjem, always listen to your lawyer. Be fair, don’t short yourself. Take your fair share.That’s not being mean. It’s bring fair. This times 1 million. I honestly can't blame my husband for not wanting sex anymore because his first wife was a total beast in their divorce (no I was not part of it but who cares if I had been?) He filed, then disregarded his attorneys advice and tried to be nice to her instead of following the attorney's advice. He regrets that, but still is glad he's away from her and so am I.. Again, some people are just mean and padgemi your wife sounds mean and vindictive. You MUST take care of you now. for you and your kids. She's a professional and she can live without you. She's been disdaining you anyway. To heck with her BS. Take care of you by listening to your attorney is my advice too (assuming s/he is at least half knowledgeable.) You are going to be fine. You are courageous and your wife is showing her true colors to all around. Sad! |
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Post by saarinista on Jan 13, 2020 15:46:52 GMT -5
Oh that dark thought is already in my head. I have tried to present evidence to my lawyer, but most of it is verbal and flimsy on paper. Since diagnosis I’ve been seeing a psychiatrist at least once every 3 months. On my last visit a couple weeks ago, when I announced the divorce, he said to me: “You know, she’s never forgiven you for whatever happened 8 years ago.” He’s spot on, but I was ASTONISHED he said it out loud! Well what does that tell you? Your psychiatrist knows. Hang tough, brother. As someone who's dealt with years of depression and anxiety I deplore anyone who weaponizes those of us who responsibly seek treatment. Could it be your wife is the undiagnosed patient? Again, you sound like you're doing the right stuff. Keep that support network strong and don't buy into her mind games, which are bad for your kids, a waste of her own energy and bespeak the possibility that SHE has significant issues she has yet to deal with. Just saying. |
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Post by padgemi on Jan 22, 2020 22:10:57 GMT -5
Got voicemail from my atty today. She’s been trying to get a response from opposition for several weeks now. Phone tag, a letter, but no actual productive conversation and no counter offer. Apparently there was supposed to be a prearranged phone call yesterday, but HE STOOD HER UP!
Now my lawyer is feeling “blown-off” [PISSED] and is now recommending some additional measures to light a fire under this case.
That makes me smile. :-) Makin’ progress!
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Post by padgemi on Feb 3, 2020 11:20:44 GMT -5
Finally a response from defendant's counsel.
Something unique was added to the standard form response:
"3. As to Husband's request to be primary residential parent, Wife would show that Husband is neither fit nor proper for such and has admitted that he has been diagnosed as Bi-Polar Disorder and as such, he is not sufficiently stable to care for minor children and further, any visitation, if awarded to Husband, should be with a supervisor subject to Wife's reasonable approval."
Them's fightin' words! It's like they say "nothing's fair in love and war." So lets make war, not love! The first part of this was expected, but the supervisor bit is what we in the mental health community call a trigger. Yeah you go ahead and try to trigger me, woman. (You've been doing it so long I have pretty much mastered controlled chaos by now.)
Oh and by the way, W texted me to make sure I will be back from Memphis in time to pick the girls up from school this afternoon. Forwarding to plaintiff's counsel right now. Curious to see if a supervisor will be there waiting...
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Post by northstarmom on Feb 3, 2020 18:11:04 GMT -5
This is ridiculous: “ 3. As to Husband's request to be primary residential parent, Wife would show that Husband is neither fit nor proper for such and has admitted that he has been diagnosed as Bi-Polar Disorder and as such, he is not sufficiently stable to care for minor children and further, any visitation, if awarded to Husband, should be with a supervisor subject to Wife's reasonable approval."
Keep documenting how you wife trusts you now to care for the children without supervision. This will allow the lawyers and judge to see how petty and vindictive your wife is.
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Post by saarinista on Feb 3, 2020 18:43:25 GMT -5
padgemi that is total BS on your wife's heart, I agree. Supervised visitation is for murderers or child sexual abusers. Since when is a treated mood disorder cause for reduction of your parental rights? Grr. Tell your local NAMI chapter. Do they have any ideas how to combat this discrimination?
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Post by padgemi on Feb 3, 2020 19:48:50 GMT -5
Boom! My laywer is killin' it with the same-day turnaround! It was the most joyful document I've read of late.
My favorite part:
"In regard to the allegations of the third sentence of Paragraph VI, the Husband would state that both parties are fit and proper persons to be primary residential parent of the minor children and that, in fact, it has been the Husband who has been primarily responsible for the day-to-day caretaking responsibilities of the children prior to his informing the Wife that he wants a divorce, at which time the Wife’s attitude and demeanor regarding his time and responsibilities with the children drastically changed and suddenly Wife is alleging that Husband’s prior diagnosis is a major issue which renders him unfit to parent, although the same has not been an issue over the prior eight (8) years of parenting. In regard to the allegations of the fourth sentence of Paragraph VI, the Husband admits that he was diagnosed bipolar in 2011 and that takes his mediation as prescribed and that the same is well-maintained. Husband adamantly denies the remaining allegations of the fourth sentence of Paragraph VI. Husband has exercised daily “unsupervised” parenting time of the children when being primarily responsible for the day-to-day caretaking of the children prior to his informing the Wife that he wants a divorce, at which time the Wife’s attitude and demeanor drastically changed, presumably in an effort to bolster her position in this divorce. Husband is a great father and has always been very active and involved in the children’s lives."
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Post by Handy on Feb 3, 2020 19:50:34 GMT -5
Northstarmom
This will allow the lawyers and judge to see how petty and vindictive your wife is.
Petty and vindictive is correct.
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Post by greatcoastal on Feb 3, 2020 20:10:24 GMT -5
Sadly, this manipulation will go on, and on... (multiple lawyers) and may never reach a judge. Then comes the crazy part of "what judge you get". Stay strong by drawing strength from your attorney. In fact use this to demand more of your own rights and time with your children.
Typical narcissistic behavior, give them an inch and they will take your kidney.
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Post by workingonit on Feb 3, 2020 20:37:33 GMT -5
Go lawyer go!!! Bipolar is not a disqualifying condition for ANYTHING. Too bad being a total bitch is not either. Such cruelty is well worthy of the b word, IMO. padgemi you are doing great! Keep it up! |
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Post by sadkat on Feb 3, 2020 20:57:02 GMT -5
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Post by greatcoastal on Feb 7, 2020 19:53:54 GMT -5
Finally a response from defendant's counsel. Something unique was added to the standard form response: "3. As to Husband's request to be primary residential parent, Wife would show that Husband is neither fit nor proper for such and has admitted that he has been diagnosed as Bi-Polar Disorder and as such, he is not sufficiently stable to care for minor children and further, any visitation, if awarded to Husband, should be with a supervisor subject to Wife's reasonable approval." Them's fightin' words! It's like they say " nothing's fair in love and war." So lets make war, not love! The first part of this was expected, but the supervisor bit is what we in the mental health community call a trigger. Yeah you go ahead and try to trigger me, woman. (You've been doing it so long I have pretty much mastered controlled chaos by now.) Oh and by the way, W texted me to make sure I will be back from Memphis in time to pick the girls up from school this afternoon. Forwarding to plaintiff's counsel right now. Curious to see if a supervisor will be there waiting... |
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