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Post by solodriver on Jan 30, 2019 21:53:33 GMT -5
I'll take "dildo vibrators" for five hundred, Alex. It’s a Rabbit. "Wabbit Season"
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Post by tiredoftears on Feb 1, 2019 4:57:42 GMT -5
He hasn't brought it up, and neither have I. The last three years, I asked for sex and chocolate, only to receive the latter. IF he brings up Valentine's Day, I plan on telling him we no longer celebrate it, because we aren't romantically involved. Maybe I'll spend the night with a fuck buddy.
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Post by ironhamster on Feb 1, 2019 19:20:39 GMT -5
He hasn't brought it up, and neither have I. The last three years, I asked for sex and chocolate, only to receive the latter. IF he brings up Valentine's Day, I plan on telling him we no longer celebrate it, because we aren't romantically involved. Maybe I'll spend the night with a fuck buddy. Crapity crap crap crap. I am so sorry to hear things have degraded again, but hopefully the outsourcing is good.
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Post by tiredoftears on Feb 1, 2019 19:22:48 GMT -5
He hasn't brought it up, and neither have I. The last three years, I asked for sex and chocolate, only to receive the latter. IF he brings up Valentine's Day, I plan on telling him we no longer celebrate it, because we aren't romantically involved. Maybe I'll spend the night with a fuck buddy. Crapity crap crap crap. I am so sorry to hear things have degraded again, but hopefully the outsourcing is good. Oh, maybe I wrote that wrong. No, we are still getting along great.
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Post by tiredoftears on Feb 2, 2019 4:55:28 GMT -5
I think I'm just still hurt about the last three Valentine's Days. And just because now I have the option of fucking other people, doesn't fix it. It hurts less, but it still hurts. The solution became "I'll just fuck other people." But I still was never told what the problem was in the first place. So it's like, no closure. The weird thing is, I have been fine with it this whole last year, completely felt like "ok, things are 'fixed' now". But with Valentine's Day approaching, it feels different. The shame has returned. Maybe I'm just hung up on unnecessary details. We do still get along great, never fight or argue. But.... IDK. I just am starting to feel crappy again. Maybe it's because I haven't had sex since the beginning of December. IDK. As soon as I'm over this cold, I'm scheduling another play date.
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Post by Handy on Feb 2, 2019 17:05:17 GMT -5
Tiredoftears IDK. I just am starting to feel crappy again.Tiredoftears, even if you have a play mate FWB, like other's here on ILIASM have said, you likely want the whole package, love, sex, a partner that will back you up 100%, emotional, financial stability, shared family members and events. I have a strong V-day is different for most men than it is for most women. V-day was mostly some one sided holiday where I gave and didn't get anything back.
When some women talked about equal rights I thought, well V-day is mostly for women, what do most men get on V-day=next to nothing in my case.
Today I see V-day as a marketing tool to sell over priced stuff most people don't need. The example I had in mind is "Pajamagram" $80 for cotton pajamas?
I am good with doing something special for my W, well I used to be, but what I did was reasonable and sometimes we had some good times. But that ended so now Feb 14 is a work day where I might bring home something from Abby's instead of cooking and getting complaints about what I cooked.
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Post by northstarmom on Feb 2, 2019 18:36:34 GMT -5
Tired of tears: “But I still was never told what the problem was in the first place. So it's like, no closure.”
You can’t rely on another person for closure. Closure is when you stop why chasing and choose instead to do things under your control that will give you the life you want.
I never learned why my husband didn’t fuck me. The more I focused on doing things that made me happy, the less it mattered.
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Post by lessingham on Feb 3, 2019 6:28:09 GMT -5
The last time I bothered with Valentine's day it was a disaster. I arranged a romantic dinner in a rated country restaurant, with flowers delivered to the table. I bought a card. I did everything she delighted in we got home after a great romantic evening and she sauntered tovthe video to check her programmes had recorded. Then sat and watched them. I agree there is a bit of a promised bargain, you men jump through hoops and we women will make love to you.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 4, 2019 20:20:08 GMT -5
I've had many nice Valentine's Days. Do an activity, make dinner, maybe go for a walk (when we lived somewhere warmer). Lovely. No sex though, in fact her stress over "expected sex" early in the marriage was palpable.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 4, 2019 21:03:34 GMT -5
Handy Tiredoftears, even if you have a play mate FWB, like other's here on ILIASM have said, you likely want the whole package, love, sex, a partner that will back you up 100%, emotional, financial stability, shared family members and events. Yes ... I agree with this 100%. I have outsource options but they aren't the same. They aren't who or what I am truly wanting or needing. Initially they soothe the ache, but after a while they become glaring flood lights shining squarely on the real problem.
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Post by elkclan2 on Feb 5, 2019 8:45:13 GMT -5
I like V-day. My partner is not so keen, but he's not anti V-day. I don't like store bought cards. I really don't want to go out to eat on V-Day (it's probably ok now, but i can remember restaurants being fully booked). My ideal V-Day is a small token gift (like really small). A couple of drinks at home and some cuddles. This will only be our 2nd V-day and he is actually away and probably won't be back until late at night. Maybe I'll surprise him with a v-day outfit ;-).
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Post by iceman on Feb 6, 2019 15:07:30 GMT -5
God, I hate Valentines Day!!!! That said, we still go through the motions and buy a card, flowers, etc. Just pathetic!
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Post by jim44444 on Feb 11, 2019 20:14:47 GMT -5
Hmmm. This thread has got me to thinking. Maybe this year I will go the whole romance route with flowers, a card, some chocolate. Just for the fun of fucking with her mind. She will wonder what the hell I am up to since we have 4 grandkids spending the night on Thursday.
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Post by choosinghappy on Feb 11, 2019 22:57:36 GMT -5
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Post by lessingham on Feb 12, 2019 5:10:11 GMT -5
Just a weird aside. I met st. Valentine! Well sort of. His skull was a relic in a Roman church. It sat on a velvet cushion with a red rose entwined. Creepy, goth and sentimental all in one.
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