Helpful resources

I would imagine Brother thefire24 , if your marriage is a bit jaded that there are many websites and books and counsellors who can assist in getting a marriage that has got a bit off track onto the rails again. Under those circumstances your chances of righting a 'standard' marriage are actually pretty good. At least a 50/50 I'd suggest, if you got onto it early on.

Thing is, such marriages do NOT tend to find their way into this group. They tend to have already been fixed if they were fixable.

The marriages that filter their way down into the murk of ILIASM are pretty much the arse end of the dysfunctional marriage demographic.
Invariably they tell tales of deep dysfunction and incompatibility of years standing with such deterioration that even basic stuff like sex has gone by the wayside.

You haven't given up much about your marriage in your posts thus far (other than it is sexless or near enough to) so it is very difficult to make any meaningful suggestions here.
But if your deal is "typical" of the deals in here.........then your outcome is highly likely to be very similar to what you've thus far seen in here.

What else is going on in your deal (apart from the sex) Brother thefire24 ?

Addendum.
I see on another post of yours (in the Sexually Speaking section) that you are bi-sexual Brother thefire24 .
That, is a pretty pertinent bit of information about your deal that was not originally divulged.
Does your missus know about this ?
If she does, is she ok with it ?
If she doesn't, do you think she should know ?

You really don’t need a book.

I really believe that threatening with divorce whether you mean it or not is the way to go. I was married 23 years and I regret not threatening with divorce sooner and laying down my expectations. I wish I would have said something along the lines of “no sex and enforced celibacy does not work for me, marriage is supposed to include sex if not we are just roommates. I need you to want to have sex at least once a week,it better be enthusiastic and include you eating my pussy. If you are not capable then eventually we will be divorced”.

She may accuse you of threatening her but just say it’s not a threat it’s a warning shot.

I never said it but eventually I divorced him.

As far as books - I really like “Mating in Captivity “ by Ester Perel but you can watch a couple of her videos on YouTube and get the jist of the book.

Ultimately you can not make someone want sex with you but I do think some people will to prevent divorce.

The lesson I am still learning is that first you have to be true to yourself. Then you have to be true to your spouse. No assumptions, no hints, no games - know what you want, know how important it is to you, and clearly convey that to your partner in a way that cannot be misunderstood.

And then insist that she is as honest as possible in her response; don't let her sidetrack you or push the topic off. Don't let her fool herself or you.

Communication is 90% of the way to resolution - whatever the resolution is.

Just Google and you'll find many books and websites that could be helpful -- IF -- your SPOUSE -- as well as you follow their advice. Most people who end up here, however, don't find such sites helpful because their spouse won't collaborate in following the suggestions. Noone can heal their marriage by themselves.

For instance-- 5 Love Languages - can be a very useful book. My marital counselor suggested it. My love languages were words of affirmation and physical touch. My husband's learning that information didn't result in his performing those things with me. Thus, he is now an ex and I'm with someone who doesn't need to be told or coaxed to demonstrate his love in ways that are meaningful to me.

There’s an online quiz for free. Love Languages is a good tool.

Very true. I know we need to look into therapy again. Even if we can only afford once a month or so.