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Post by eternaloptimism on Aug 14, 2016 7:05:17 GMT -5
Strange you should put it that way... It was my eldest sister who kicked my ass into leaving him when I told her that story at the time.
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Post by baza on Aug 14, 2016 7:16:56 GMT -5
I think, Sister eternaloptimism, that the usual ILIASM shithole protocols apply (with one HUGE addition) in a situation where violence might be in play.
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Legal advice, as per usual, development of an exit strategy, as usual, support network in place, at stronger levels than usual, advice about helping the kids transition, as usual and TO KEEP YOUR PLAN TOTALLY SECRET as the crucial addition.
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Support and tactical advice from experts in the field - like a Womens shelter in your jurisdiction - could be super valuable.
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An initial problem in advancing your position is going to be the fact that the lazy cunt is under your feet 24/7 at the moment, which is going to make planning difficult, and TOTAL SECRECY very very difficult.
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Not impossible, but very very difficult.
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Post by unmatched on Aug 14, 2016 7:56:41 GMT -5
eternaloptimism that puts a VERY different complexion on things. At this point you owe him fuck all, and I completely agree with baza. Make your plans in secret, involve your sister and other family if you can, get the locks changed, tell him in a public place and don't let him back in the house. That person who he was 14 years ago didn't go away, you have just been appeasing him all this time. Hoping that if YOU could only be perfect he wouldn't be such an abusive taker. That is a five year old girl's way of dealing with an abusive parent because it is the only power she has. You are a strong, independent adult and you don't have to take his shit any more. But be smart about it. If you can plan this with your sister or someone else it will make things a whole lot easier and safer and less lonely. And it will give you momentum when you need it to get over the bumps.
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