I'm still "in the closet" re: dealing with my SM; she knows it is an issue, but not about how we are dangerously plodding steadily toward a divorce. I guess I figure she should hear it from me before some mutual acquaintance sees my pic and asks her what's that about. So, no, no photo as my avatar at this time. Probably would be willing once I move on.
However, I have been told recently: "I think you did a good job depicting yourself in your cartoon avatar!"
So with that, you should be apparently be able to pick me out of a crowd... here, click this and look for me in this:
When I came to EP and discovered that my stbx's feelings about sex/intimacy/connection had very little to do with what I was or wasn't doing.... I had to make a decision. Was I prepared to continue pretending that we had a good relationship or was I going to own my future in a way that was genuine? It really wasn't a question since I suck at pretense. I talked to friends, family and anyone on the forum that would listen...and I told him what the group was about. Learning to be honest with myself and not feel ashamed was my goal. Saying that this is what I'm dealing with, this is my life, this is what I think, this is how I feel, is the only way I know how to do that. For me, posting my picture was a big part of saying "I am enough". Even though I had no idea that was what I needed at the time, it felt right. Doing that small thing just for me was an important part of reclaiming myself. My journey is unique - do what feels right for you.
This the "Shoutbox" -- basically a site-wide, group chat. (It's only visible to members.)
petrushka: In my world view, you are buying into some really shitty memes there.
Nov 5, 2019 17:25:20 GMT -5
apocrypha: The "feminist agenda" has changed across the past 60 years. Some feminists of the 60's call the current iteration "fainting couch feminism", thinking it a subversion and betrayal of women's lib. Hard to get a bead on what folks think, using a broad label.
Nov 8, 2019 9:37:14 GMT -5
apocrypha: No aspect of that article (which I amount to a magazine offering bad diet advice) promotes rape, coercion (beyond seduction), sexual assault, and I don't understand your public performance suggesting that they would be and thus implicating bfar.
Nov 8, 2019 9:41:51 GMT -5
mirrororchid: pfar, being sensitive means understanding how others think and feel. It doesn't mean you are compelled to adopt their thoughts and feelings. This is a matter of understanding people including loved ones. If you aren't sensitive, you lack tools to
Nov 11, 2019 8:09:49 GMT -5
mirrororchid: live well. You need not soften, but you should be able to understand vulnerability. Recognizing others' distress provides me with cues when I need to use self-control or extend help. If you're strong, you should be helping others. Use what works.
Nov 11, 2019 8:14:06 GMT -5
worksforme2: You know who I miss ...I miss smartkat and andie..and snowman 12345
Nov 14, 2019 9:16:44 GMT -5