Post by WindSister on Aug 14, 2017 13:49:37 GMT -5
Aug 14, 2017 13:08:28 GMT -5 @creelunion said:
Awake, I cannot recall if I remember you from EP.
Wow this speaks so much to me. I hope I find something like this.
He is fiercely protective of us (our relationship): I've discussed this with friends of mine. You can't let even the smallest piece of lint get between you. It grows. Relationships are the most important things. And this is the most important relationship. They need and deserve protection. I'm looking forward to that. If I get a chance.
He checked off every little thing on my checklist without me telling him: Funny how that works isn't it?
Effortless - easy: It doesn't have to be hard does it? If you keep the lint away, the filth cannot accumulate.
He helped me through them (instead of calling me "crazy" which is what my ex did): He Builds You. He Benefits from your strength. And He KNOWS IT!
He says with me his wall of anger, helplessness and self-protection just disappeared: Gosh, the ability to let all that crap go and just be held. Just be vulnerable without any fear that you'll get dropped on your head.
Growth!!: I'm looking forward to it!
He always called me his angel. : You're unreal to him. He couldn't fully comprehend your existence. I'm sure he had to see others see you to be sure you weren't just a pleasant figment of his imagination.
We actually read the Four Horsemen of the Marriage Apocalypse quite often. : I've been taught some of that one and I've read parts of it. I seem to recall one of the points is Contempt. Why would someone have contempt for their spouse? I've tried to deal with that one.
Thanks for sharing this. It's hopeful.
I've stayed away from this board most of the past year. So much bitterness and ........ Other stuff. I needed to focus. I still need to focus.
Working through the divorce is hard and each divorce is different. Mine was relatively easy because our relationship/marriage was SO DEAD. There was simply nothing there and really never was. I can't imagine a good relationship turning bad, trying to fix it, deeming it unfixable and then walking away. That would be harder than what I had to deal with. I do try to acknowledge that.
What I have now is what I never had and every single day I am so grateful. If this died, that would be hard to work through for me. I am completely and 100% vulnerable here because I am so in love with my husband.
So far so good though.
The things you highlighted I am actually still validated with regularly. He doesn't let lint in - not even if it's his daughters trying to control us in some way. We had a big family deal come up this weekend and .... well, he had my back. The man had my back. We were loving and direct with his kids (actually, he was, I was silent until it was all said and and done and then I just talked with them to reaffirm I love them and support them and the grandkids always). I didn't have to ASK him to have my back, he just had it. That is still shocking to me. I never experienced that before.
Anyway, I swear I am not here to brag or be smug, I am still in shock of the life I landed in.
I just want everyone to find their own kind of happiness, contentment, peace, love, joy. And, of course intimacy, passion. In whatever way works for them.
Wishing you the best!!