Post by mirrororchid on Sept 3, 2021 5:56:23 GMT -5
Here's what came up - (there were 34 responders)
Met on internet - 10 (29%)
Met at school/college/uni - 9 (26%)
Met at social group - 4 (12%)
Met at work - 4 (12%)
Met at a bar - 3 (8%)
Met at a party - 2 (6%)
Met via want adds in paper - 2 (6%)
Met by speed dating - 1 (3%)
Met by mutual friend - 1 (3%)
Make of it what you will, but it would seem that you can pick up a dud anywhere, not just the net.
Found a poll at a non-SM site to unscientifically compare with the masses:
We were childhood friends or high school sweethearts 95 (23%)
We were introduced by friends/family 91 (22%)
We met online 91 (22%)
We randomly met one day (college, bar, other random place) 86 (21%)
Other 44 (11%)
I grouped similar categories by color.
This grouping is subject to interpretation, so you may see different results.
For example, childhood friends likely met at school, but not necessarily.
The "Met at Work" Category doesn't strike me as a "Random Place", but might qualify? College is a work place, so randomly meeting there may not be accurate either.
So comparing apples to oranges, as I must:
Someone you met online (or, in paper form, Want Ads) are both methods of meeting strangers with a brief description. They are 59% more likely to lead to a SM. [i.e. 35% SM vs. 22% not SM]
Someone you met randomly (social group, party, college, bar, other random place) is 24% more likely to be your refuser.
Someone you met while you were young is 13% more likely to land you in an SM.
and on the chin rubbing, thoughtful end of things (bearing in mind the dangers of n=1 sample size):
Someone you met through a friend or family is 86% LESS likely to land you in an SM.
I don't see that I answered the question.
Mrs. MirrorOrchid was a friend of a woman who was already seeing someone who I met at a bar where I was meeting friends I socialized with online.
Before I married her, I asked my family after two failed long term relationships, "I'm a bad judge of life partners, clearly. Is she a winner?" They were unanimous in their approval.
I feel it's fair to claim the friend/family category applies, so it's feasible to say that meeting a spouse through friends and family is only 73% less likely to lead to SM.
However, the wife and I have had a reset since Dec 2019, so, it may be easier to escape an SM with a spouse your family/friends liked? (at least temporarily? neither of us is dead yet.)
Even if the MirrorOrchid recovery is inevitably doomed, 73% lower likelihood is a stunning endorsement of trusting the people who know/love you with your sex life than yourself.