Post by baza on Sept 3, 2016 0:01:56 GMT -5
Ms enna's family are having their pre Xmas piss up social gathering in early December, about 10 hours away from us.
My two (adult) kids have been invited as well (they know Ms enna quite well, but have never met her extended family). They are quite keen to do so.
So presently, we are dealing with assorted logistics as to how we might bring this all together.
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Trying to accomodate how we will pull the whole thing together with competing work commitments of the 4 individuals, available time off, etc etc and etc is making my brain hurt. It seems that any one little thing that goes wrong might easily turn the whole road trip thing guts up.
I know my kids very well, and I think it highly likely that if the eldest starts to think this is getting bigger than Ben-Hur he will give the whole thing the arse, and my youngest will scrub the idea if he gets a better offer.
Ms enna does not share my opinion about my kids and believes that they will make whatever adjustments necessary to their schedules to fit this in.
What she is basing this conviction on I am none too sure. (It certainly can NOT be their record of reliability !!!!)
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So we are debating the whole thing, attempting to produce a workable resolution.
My position was - tell my kids when and where thispiss up social gathering is, and let them make their own arrangements about attending, and how they do so, with one of the options being to travel up by road with us (and the dog !!)
Enna wants to take a more pro-active position to make it easier for my kids, thus enhancing the chances that they will attend what ought be a fun weekend.
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In my ILIASM deal, this would have been done and dusted days ago. It would have all been "too hard" and the whole idea would have been scrubbed. Then would have come the recriminations and ill will.
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Over in OppositeLand, things are different. In this dynamic, a resolution needs to be settled upon. And it is necessary to keep hacking at it until a resolution is found.
We discussed this for several hours last night, then went to bed and had a root.
Today, it doesn't seem as big a deal, and we have jointly come up with 3 alternative strategies, one of which will surely meet 'most' of the needs of 'most' of the participants.
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And I am sitting here now, wondering over how different things are for me now, as opposed to then.
How it is possible to work through issues without rancour, to have ones opinion heard, to have helpful opinions offered up by ones partner.
To work through shit together.
-
It is just sooooo different to ILIASM-Land.
And it keeps surprising me, 6+ years down the track.
My two (adult) kids have been invited as well (they know Ms enna quite well, but have never met her extended family). They are quite keen to do so.
So presently, we are dealing with assorted logistics as to how we might bring this all together.
-
Trying to accomodate how we will pull the whole thing together with competing work commitments of the 4 individuals, available time off, etc etc and etc is making my brain hurt. It seems that any one little thing that goes wrong might easily turn the whole road trip thing guts up.
I know my kids very well, and I think it highly likely that if the eldest starts to think this is getting bigger than Ben-Hur he will give the whole thing the arse, and my youngest will scrub the idea if he gets a better offer.
Ms enna does not share my opinion about my kids and believes that they will make whatever adjustments necessary to their schedules to fit this in.
What she is basing this conviction on I am none too sure. (It certainly can NOT be their record of reliability !!!!)
-
So we are debating the whole thing, attempting to produce a workable resolution.
My position was - tell my kids when and where this
Enna wants to take a more pro-active position to make it easier for my kids, thus enhancing the chances that they will attend what ought be a fun weekend.
-
In my ILIASM deal, this would have been done and dusted days ago. It would have all been "too hard" and the whole idea would have been scrubbed. Then would have come the recriminations and ill will.
-
Over in OppositeLand, things are different. In this dynamic, a resolution needs to be settled upon. And it is necessary to keep hacking at it until a resolution is found.
We discussed this for several hours last night, then went to bed and had a root.
Today, it doesn't seem as big a deal, and we have jointly come up with 3 alternative strategies, one of which will surely meet 'most' of the needs of 'most' of the participants.
-
And I am sitting here now, wondering over how different things are for me now, as opposed to then.
How it is possible to work through issues without rancour, to have ones opinion heard, to have helpful opinions offered up by ones partner.
To work through shit together.
-
It is just sooooo different to ILIASM-Land.
And it keeps surprising me, 6+ years down the track.
