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Post by thebaffledking on Dec 16, 2022 5:37:39 GMT -5
"She use to tell me if I let let her get it our sex life would improve.. I’d have the green light whenever I wanted....."
This is always a ruse. If a person wants and d3sires sexual intimacy, especially with a willing partner with a wedding band on and right there next to them, they will get after it.
This statement pisses me off so much, because my ex said the same fucking thing about me getting a vasectomy. Got the fucking vasectomy and NOTHING CHANGED! Unreal.
That was about 20 years ago. It took me 12 more years to finally let go and get out. It was either that or suicide. God put a very very special woman directly in my path 8 years ago so that I had a new option: HAPPINESS AND PEACE.
People, please, NEVER BELIEVE THE NONSEXUAL PARTNER if they say sex will suddenly be frequent and amazing IF, IF, IF.....it's bullshit. Absolute and reprehensible bullshit.
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Post by thebaffledking on Dec 16, 2022 3:11:34 GMT -5
Hello everyone, new and old. Still on the other side and still happy. Just got back from overseas for the holidays, staying in a mountain cabin in NC, and enjoying life with the gal I met by happenstance about 8 years ago now, on the old Experience Project. Life in all its facets is great. We both decided to start hormone support therapy six months ago and my gawd, we are boning like we're 24 years old ( we are 54, she, and 61, me). In fact due to jetlag we are both wide awake on the pullout in her dad's living room. Too risky to actually fuck, but she got a nice orgasm out of it. If anyone is interested, Google Action Mens Health (but they also treat women!). Not an ad, just passing along info. I have never been hornier, harder, or experienced such intense releases, not even 40 years ago. Anyway, just wanted to say hi, all is well, and if you are choosing to stay or leave, may peace infuse your life and may the Holidays brighten your soul!
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Post by thebaffledking on Apr 27, 2021 5:40:10 GMT -5
I had typed about 15 minutes of an update post, then Poof, all gone. So fuck it.
Just FYI, I escaped from hell several years ago and am now truly happy. Sex is normal again, and fantastic every time. Who knew?! But above all, we just so enjoy being together for everything in life, from shopping to traveling. Everything is fun and peaceful. Though I was suicidal for a good two or three years before the window opened and I climbed out, I am really happy now. Life is good again and I have a normal, fulfilling, happy, sexually awesome life.
Do it. Leave. Save your one and only stretch of time on this planet.
No longer baffled.... I am now just the king of my own life experience once again.
Cheers!!
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Post by thebaffledking on Jun 15, 2020 3:15:14 GMT -5
Keep in mind that gaslighting isn't always intentional. They may actually believe everything they are saying to you. So if you find yourself saying he/she is such a good person at heart and would never gaslight me......they may not even realize it. This realization, however, does NOT change the situation. Understanding THEM is the last thing you have time for when it's all hands on deck time.
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Post by thebaffledking on Dec 27, 2019 17:48:10 GMT -5
Yes, as of June 2018. To quote Pete Rose, getting out was like walking through hell in a gasoline suit. But I kept walking because I knew if I stopped I'd burst into flames and that would have been The End. Best thing I ever did for myself, my life, my soul, my heart, my body, everything. I am very very happy with where I am right now and life is looking good!
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Post by thebaffledking on Dec 12, 2019 5:02:22 GMT -5
Wow, haven't been here in many moons. Just stopped in to see how everyone's doing, and to give another update. So it's been 18 months since I walked out of fifteen years in hell (out of 33 total together - there HAD been a number of very good years!) It took about a year to 'believe' I'd actually made it out, that's how hard it was.....probably not unlike someone who's spent years in prison and is finally freed. Nonetheless, I was exhilirated from the moment I finally opened my mouth. It felt like being born again, not without pain but ultimately astonishing. I'd met someone on the old EP about six years ago, and that mutual instant connection finally gave me the strength to leave and live. We just got engaged a couple of weeks ago and will be married in January. We have such a close bond. The physicality is unlike anything I've ever known. We just flat out enjoy each others company every day, every way. This is what lay on 'the other side'. I'm never one to 'push' people to leave, but my gawd. I'm glad I paid attention to all of the advice and stories and inspiration I received and read over the years. The rest of my life is shaping up to be better than I could have ever imagined.
Staying or Leaving, I wish you all the Happiest of Holidays!
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Post by thebaffledking on Apr 19, 2019 17:02:57 GMT -5
I know he loves me but he no longer has any desire for me. This has been going on coming up on 3 years. I miss being wanted by him. I have asked, insinuated, sexted, you name it, I've tried everything. The only response I get is that he is over 40 and just no longer has the "drive". I think what he really means is that he no longer has the drive for me. I want to not hurt so much by his rejection. How do you handle it? The age thing is a cop-out on his part. I'm 58 and have never had a drop-out in sexual desire or function. I ended up leaving a 33-year marriage (18 of which were good and normal and 'forever'......the last 15 of which not only did she abandon me physically but emotionally as well......though she did not abandon the income and lifestyle I was giving her). I just couldn't take it. Ten straight years with NO sex and ZERO remorse on her part. To this day, she doesn't get it. Apples and oranges will never become apples and apples or oranges and oranges. It's like that, and that's the way it is.
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Post by thebaffledking on Apr 5, 2019 20:21:55 GMT -5
Grinding over almost 15 years, suicidal for a couple years..... Verbally ended it in June 18......divorce final.... Spending time with an amazing woman, having fun, fucking whenever, leaving tomorrow for a tropical paradise in the Philippines, lost 30 pounds, lifting, feeling awesome. May all this and more await you once you find the strength to let go.
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Post by thebaffledking on Dec 31, 2018 3:28:32 GMT -5
That it is, my good man, that it is!!
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Post by thebaffledking on Dec 28, 2018 8:20:11 GMT -5
So happy for you! May 2019 bring you more love and happiness! Thanks so much, sadkat!! Hope you have an amazing 2019 as well!
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Post by thebaffledking on Dec 28, 2018 8:19:06 GMT -5
Your story is wonderful. Best wishes to you in the coming year. Thank you, good sir! Best wishes to you as well!
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Post by thebaffledking on Dec 28, 2018 8:18:24 GMT -5
I'm Keto too! Loooove it. Anyway...so happy for you both. May it continue for you both! Much happiness for 2019! I spent a few hours purging all carbs/sugars from my pantry and fridge........and have loaded up on the good stuff (-: Excited to get started!!!
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Post by thebaffledking on Dec 25, 2018 1:02:41 GMT -5
Quick update......life is grand (not perfect, because divorce is a rather sudden change in all you have known - but awfully damn goods as the spiderwebs from the past get swept from the corners). I am with the sweetest southern gal imaginable. OMG, she even comes at me to kiss me like she means business! Our days and nights are so much fun - yes, FUN......I'd forgotten what FUN felt like. We will just head out and walk around to see what life has to offer, regularly logging 10,000-12,000 steps. Someone to talk to, to listen to, to touch, to kiss, to mash up with on the couch for a movie, I am cooking every night and loving it (we both decided to go keto together, so we're sharing that journey as well). It's just a whole new, normal, wonderful, restful, PEACEFUL world I inhabit now and I just feel so fortunate and grateful to have made it out. And yes, she enjoys being boned four ways from Friday!
For those who are out, I wish you a growth-oriented, change-oriented year where you get what you want and need in this life. For those who are in.......I wish the exact same thing (-:
Happy Holidays Indeed!!
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Post by thebaffledking on Oct 24, 2018 7:48:24 GMT -5
Thanks, Shammy.....you inspired me, too.....we had some good chats that really kept me pushing forward. Thank YOU!
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Post by thebaffledking on Oct 24, 2018 5:40:48 GMT -5
She will be walking through my door with her suitcases.....not for a visit, but to stay forever. The 4.5 years of waiting is finally coming to an end......but thank God we didn't know when we met how LONG it would take to get to this point!
We're both pretty private people and not much into the social media, but I will try and return now and then with some news and the occasional HAPPY picture!
I wish you ALL the same peace and joy and love, whether it comes from staying or leaving. We ALL deserve to live that life.
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