I have insomnia- because I have too much on my mind; because of all the crap I am going through right now. If my significant other were to give me a back (or foot) rub and could manage to relax me enough, I’d also fall asleep. I guess where I’d be different is that I would reward the back-rubber when I woke up. 😉
tap- I’m sorry you’re having such a rough time of it. It’s bad enough that you are struggling with an sm. Add to that an unhappy wife because of relocation- that must be very difficult!
Post by hopingforachange on Aug 22, 2019 15:45:41 GMT -5
If she'll read it, ask her read Song of Solomon/Songs. Hell read it together. And another good book is Good girls good to great sex by Sheila stay Gregoire. It's a Christian based book that helps with the transition from purity rings stigma crap to being ok to want sex in marriage.
Post by hopingforachange on Aug 22, 2019 15:47:56 GMT -5
When my marriage was in the depths of SM, I stopped doing back rubs because it would make me crave the intimacy even more. To this day, even after the improvement, I still don't do them unless she asks, it's not something I like to do for her anymore.
Another birthday and anniversary year gone and no sex for the year. We moved to Austin TX a year ago for my job and my wife hates it here. She says there is nothing to do. We moved from Chicago.
Your are in Austin TX and she claims there is nothing to do? BULLSHIT! She is feeding you a line of crap to justify her actions. If she was to tell you the truth that she does not want to fuck you would you react differently?
"I believe everything happens for a reason, sometimes the reason is you're stupid and make bad decisions." Greeneyedlady72
I still Iove my wife and like doing things for her. I believe, and she would deny it, that she is sexually repressed. She grew up in a very religious household and I think that her view of sex is a result of that.
I know when I watch something say, Game of Thrones, and she walks by and there is nudity, she will say what the heck are you watching? Ewww. There are other things like that. She doesn’t look at me in a bad way but the sex isn’t there.
Ewwww. Yup. This reaction is your sex life. Forever.
Post by ironhamster on Aug 22, 2019 20:50:29 GMT -5
I can't imagine that Austin is boring, only different. Maybe she needs some visitor guide info about going and doing things.
The thing I miss about Chicago that Austin just doesn't have is the vibrant murder tourism industry. Mayor Rahm took the Murder Capital crown from Detroit back in 2013, when Detroit faced a financial crisis and cut their murder budget, making it hard for tourists to witness a murder. Rahm, doubled down, giving ChiTown gangstas the green light to pick up the pace, so long as they only killed each other. I loved going up to see the artistic drive-bys on the weekends. Maybe she can take a road trip to Juarez if she feels homesick?
But, seriously, the key to being entertained and happy is ones self. My bet is the lack of affection was there when she was in her home town Chicago, and Austin did not change the ILIASM deal. It only changed the surroundings.
This the "Shoutbox" -- basically a site-wide, group chat. (It's only visible to members.)
petrushka: In my world view, you are buying into some really shitty memes there.
Nov 5, 2019 17:25:20 GMT -5
apocrypha: The "feminist agenda" has changed across the past 60 years. Some feminists of the 60's call the current iteration "fainting couch feminism", thinking it a subversion and betrayal of women's lib. Hard to get a bead on what folks think, using a broad label.
Nov 8, 2019 9:37:14 GMT -5
apocrypha: No aspect of that article (which I amount to a magazine offering bad diet advice) promotes rape, coercion (beyond seduction), sexual assault, and I don't understand your public performance suggesting that they would be and thus implicating bfar.
Nov 8, 2019 9:41:51 GMT -5
mirrororchid: pfar, being sensitive means understanding how others think and feel. It doesn't mean you are compelled to adopt their thoughts and feelings. This is a matter of understanding people including loved ones. If you aren't sensitive, you lack tools to
Nov 11, 2019 8:09:49 GMT -5
mirrororchid: live well. You need not soften, but you should be able to understand vulnerability. Recognizing others' distress provides me with cues when I need to use self-control or extend help. If you're strong, you should be helping others. Use what works.
Nov 11, 2019 8:14:06 GMT -5
worksforme2: You know who I miss ...I miss smartkat and andie..and snowman 12345
Nov 14, 2019 9:16:44 GMT -5