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Post by flounder on Feb 7, 2019 21:42:27 GMT -5
My wife and I were in the kitchen tonight,discussing our days,what the kids learned at school,homework,what so and so has done now with her hair,....yada yada. In all the confusion that comes with having two young children,And trying to feed them,bath them,and run them off to bed,I had barely noticed her appearance.
But that’s when I noticed.
She was wearing “ Those Pants “.
Now every man knows what pants I’m referring to,those tight jeans a woman wears on occasion that drive you mad. The ones that hug every curve so graciously,the ones that make you stand back and say; “ Damn,look at those pants !” (Forgive me ladies if it sounds a bit misogynistic.)
I couldn’t help but stare and perhaps she could feel it like some sort of spidey sense or some shit,but she turned and caught me looking and for one second I had hope that she might have liked it.
“What would you like for dinner?” “Well,I’m not thinking about spaghetti right now.”
“Oh,Ok.”
She promptly went in to the dining room and grabbed her light jacket and begin tying it around her waist to cover my view.
“I’m cold.”she said.
In more ways then one.
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Post by carl on Feb 7, 2019 22:04:11 GMT -5
Ha ha .... I think every woman knows what pants you are talking about too I am sure as much as the guys. I prefer a more subtle elegant look.
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Post by csl on Feb 7, 2019 22:12:54 GMT -5
Sweet Lord, have I become such a cynic!
Shot - “I’m cold.”she said. Chaser - "So I've noticed."
Pray fer me...
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Post by workingonit on Feb 7, 2019 22:23:23 GMT -5
Ooof. That hurts flounder . So sorry. A few points: Who ties a shirt around their waist when they are cold??? How does that help??? Also if she just wanted to cover her ass why wear THOSE jeans?? She knows how she looks and how you look at her in them. Sometimes we are surprised but usually we know. And guys have THOSE pants too and we notice those also. At least, I do. Maybe refusers don't.
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Post by flounder on Feb 7, 2019 22:39:03 GMT -5
Ooof. That hurts flounder . So sorry. A few points: Who ties a shirt around their waist when they are cold??? How does that help??? Also if she just wanted to cover her ass why wear THOSE jeans?? She knows how she looks and how you look at her in them. Sometimes we are surprised but usually we know. And guys have THOSE pants too and we notice those also. At least, I do. Maybe refusers don't. Thanks workingonit. That did hurt. My wife looked very good tonight,and it hurt that she felt compelled to cover herself from me. She knew it bothered me,so she went and changed when I wasn’t looking. Like that makes it all better.
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Post by lifeinwoodinville on Feb 7, 2019 22:41:21 GMT -5
My wife used to come home after work on a hot day, change out of her work clothes, and put on a tank top and shorts with no bra on underneath. She has rather large breasts too, that tank top left nothing to the imagination. It was my own personal torture.
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Post by baza on Feb 7, 2019 22:57:14 GMT -5
There is a glib line seen in relationship groups - it says something like "communication is key". And, I think that it is a valid enough statement. Communication IS key.
However, all communication is not pleasant, nice, nor what we'd like it to be.
Refuser communication is oftentimes rejective, and that is NOT what we want to hear. So we discount it, minimise it, try and explain it away.
But - negative/rejective communication is every bit as valid and informative as positive/inclusive communication.
"Communication" does not have to be "what you want to hear (or observe)" to be true.
Your missus covers her arse from your gaze. The communication seems crystal clear - that she does not want you looking at, touching, or lusting after, her arse.
If you then take this example of communication, put it together with her other clear past communications, and you'll come up with a pretty accurate picture of where she is and what she is communicating to you.
Chances are that you won't like the message, but that does not mean it isn't her truth.
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Post by hopingforachange on Feb 8, 2019 10:58:15 GMT -5
Maybe she wore them for someone else?
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Post by flashjohn on Feb 8, 2019 11:09:39 GMT -5
I couldn’t help but stare and perhaps she could feel it like some sort of spidey sense or some shit,but she turned and caught me looking and for one second I had hope that she might have liked it. “What would you like for dinner?” “Well,I’m not thinking about spaghetti right now.” “Oh,Ok.” She promptly went in to the dining room and grabbed her light jacket and begin tying it around her waist to cover my view. “I’m cold.”she said. In more ways then one. What a bitch. I know you wouldn't have done this, but it would have been funny if you had said, "Well I am going out to find a woman who appreciates an erection."
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Post by choosinghappy on Feb 8, 2019 12:16:21 GMT -5
Maybe she wore them for someone else? Sadly, this was my thought too... My other thought was: WTF?!!!?! I spent many years of my life wishing my H would have noticed my body in the way that you did; would have had any desire for me at all. And your wife has that, unprompted, without even having to try to get your attention, and she wraps a jacket around her waist and then changes clothes. Our refuses are fucking crazy. And workingonit great point about: who wraps something around their waist if they are cold?! She can’t even come up with a GOOD excuse. I’d venture a guess that those pants are going to be tucked away in the back of the drawer for a long time now.
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Post by isthisit on Feb 8, 2019 12:55:00 GMT -5
Maybe she wore them for someone else? Sadly, this was my thought too... My other thought was: WTF?!!!?! I spent many years of my life wishing my H would have noticed my body in the way that you did; would have had any desire for me at all. And your wife has that, unprompted, without even having to try to get your attention, and she wraps a jacket around her waist and then changes clothes. Our refuses are fucking crazy. I had this experience just after leaping from my deal. I was on my way to yoga wearing yoga pants H has seen countless times before..... with no comment whatsoever. Post separation he suddenly sees them (and me I guess) as ‘sexy’ WTF? You had 15 years for that to occur to you and you say it NOW? Too little too late buddy. But it was trying to say the least to deal with that.
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Post by flounder on Feb 8, 2019 18:17:51 GMT -5
Maybe she wore them for someone else? Sadly, this was my thought too... My other thought was: WTF?!!!?! I spent many years of my life wishing my H would have noticed my body in the way that you did; would have had any desire for me at all. And your wife has that, unprompted, without even having to try to get your attention, and she wraps a jacket around her waist and then changes clothes. Our refuses are fucking crazy. And workingonit great point about: who wraps something around their waist if they are cold?! She can’t even come up with a GOOD excuse. I’d venture a guess that those pants are going to be tucked away in the back of the drawer for a long time now. hopingforachange I doubt it. My wife doesn’t put to much time into her appearance anymore. It’s a real shame because she could really turn some heads if she wanted to. I think it was a “this is clean and I don’t have to do laundry”kind of thing. @choosinghappy they probably have been tucked away for awhile now.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Feb 8, 2019 21:11:57 GMT -5
Sadly, this was my thought too... My other thought was: WTF?!!!?! I spent many years of my life wishing my H would have noticed my body in the way that you did; would have had any desire for me at all. And your wife has that, unprompted, without even having to try to get your attention, and she wraps a jacket around her waist and then changes clothes. Our refuses are fucking crazy. I had this experience just after leaping from my deal. I was on my way to yoga wearing yoga pants H has seen countless times before..... with no comment whatsoever. Post separation he suddenly sees them (and me I guess) as ‘sexy’ WTF? You had 15 years for that to occur to you and you say it NOW? Too little too late buddy. But it was trying to say the least to deal with that. @lonelywife ... same. what I wouldn't give to be noticed like that. Instead it's the other way around, with me trying to avoid watching / seeing my husband lest I get all hot and bothered again with no outlet in my immediate future.
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muzack
Junior Member
Posts: 75
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Post by muzack on Feb 9, 2019 23:00:29 GMT -5
Sorry Flounder. That is just unfair.
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Post by Dan on Feb 10, 2019 23:00:53 GMT -5
Who ties a shirt around their waist when they are cold??? Makes sense to me. "Below the waist" sounds like her coldest parts.
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