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Post by michael on Dec 28, 2018 1:02:42 GMT -5
Does anyone know a dating site where I don’t have to give my email address to the site? I don’t want that revealed. I just want to view girls in my area and maybe go on a date.
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Post by Handy on Dec 28, 2018 5:27:25 GMT -5
I think many people just get an email just to use for dating and it isn't your regular email account. I read that one woman had a disposable / temporary email account but i don't know how to get a disposable/temporary email account.
Work from the email side and pickh a dating site you like.
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Post by shamwow on Dec 28, 2018 7:28:44 GMT -5
Stay or leave are both legitimate choices. In both of those options, cheat can be a tolerable coping strategy.
That being said, if you plan on cheating and don't want to get caught, you need a lot more than a disposable email address.
I never cheated when I was married. I'm a shitty liar and would have gotten caught so I just divorced her. So I'm probably not the one to ask. But there are a number of threads on this site that go into this in great detail.
One thing, though. A dating site is a really bad idea. You need to find someone who is also married and has just as much to lose if the whole affair goes public. Someone on a dating site could blow up your life out of spite if things didn't work out to their expectations.
Not for the faint of heart, friend.
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Post by flashjohn on Dec 28, 2018 14:29:28 GMT -5
You can set up an email on gmail that is anonymous.
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Post by deadzone75 on Dec 28, 2018 15:19:45 GMT -5
Stay or leave are both legitimate choices. In both of those options, cheat can be a tolerable coping strategy. That being said, if you plan on cheating and don't want to get caught, you need a lot more than a disposable email address. I never cheated when I was married. I'm a shitty liar and would have gotten caught so I just divorced her. So I'm probably not the one to ask. But there are a number of threads on this site that go into this in great detail. One thing, though. A dating site is a really bad idea. You need to find someone who is also married and has just as much to lose if the whole affair goes public. Someone on a dating site could blow up your life out of spite if things didn't work out to their expectations. Not for the faint of heart, friend. 1000% correct. I met someone outside of my relationship years ago, and the only reason I engaged was because she made it very, very clear she was not looking to upset the balance of her life. She had way too much to lose, but her needs not being met drove her to extremes. Neglect of your basic needs will drive you to risk everything, and sometimes without really thinking it through.
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Post by michael on Dec 28, 2018 21:19:10 GMT -5
Stay or leave are both legitimate choices. In both of those options, cheat can be a tolerable coping strategy. That being said, if you plan on cheating and don't want to get caught, you need a lot more than a disposable email address. I never cheated when I was married. I'm a shitty liar and would have gotten caught so I just divorced her. So I'm probably not the one to ask. But there are a number of threads on this site that go into this in great detail. One thing, though. A dating site is a really bad idea. You need to find someone who is also married and has just as much to lose if the whole affair goes public. Someone on a dating site could blow up your life out of spite if things didn't work out to their expectations. Not for the faint of heart, friend. I don’t plan on cheating. Just a date. But who knows where things could go.
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Post by Handy on Dec 28, 2018 21:24:53 GMT -5
Michael, even if you go out for an ice cream cone with another woman, most likely your W will consider it cheating.
One way to avoid the cheating accusation is to tell your W what you are doing and why before you do it.
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Post by baza on Dec 28, 2018 21:35:03 GMT -5
"I don’t plan on cheating. Just a date. But who knows where things could go" you say Brother michael . That is a very accurate observation you make, as in our common situations things sure can spin off on unknown (and unknowable) tangents. This is the prime reasoning for the "see a lawyer in your jurisdiction ....." suggestion so often seen in here. You DON'T know where things could go, hence it would be wise to be at least somewhat prepared for an extreme outcome.
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Post by ironhamster on Dec 28, 2018 23:43:44 GMT -5
Get a Tracfone or other burner phone. Set up your online info without any connection to your real self. Leave that phone at work. Never bring it anywhere else.
I used to work with a guy that led a double life. This system worked well for him.
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Post by northstarmom on Dec 29, 2018 13:59:57 GMT -5
Michael said: “I don’t plan on cheating. Just a date.”
You are lying to yourself. If all you wanted were a date, you’d be planning to do it with your wife.
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Post by michael on Dec 30, 2018 3:16:36 GMT -5
Michael said: “I don’t plan on cheating. Just a date.” You are lying to yourself. If all you wanted were a date, you’d be planning to do it with your wife. No. I just wanted to feel like a man for once. My wife. I know where that will go. I’ll pay and at the end of the night I’ll be on the couch as usual. So why not do that with someone else. You are right about wanting to get laid but I know that I won’t do that. Anyways, I’m pretty ashamed of my vehicle. I leave a trail wherever I go. So until I get a new one it probably won’t happen.
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Post by solodriver on Dec 31, 2018 14:38:32 GMT -5
Michael said: “I don’t plan on cheating. Just a date.” You are lying to yourself. If all you wanted were a date, you’d be planning to do it with your wife. No. I just wanted to feel like a man for once. My wife. I know where that will go. I’ll pay and at the end of the night I’ll be on the couch as usual. So why not do that with someone else. You are right about wanting to get laid. . . My situation exactly, which is why I'm working on an exit plan. My situation will never get better than what you described.
As hard as it is, once you understand that situation and quit accepting the bullshit and their excuses for their behavior, it will motivate you to reach for what you most want and need and get out of the situation you're currently in. An affair, as risky and challenging as it is, at the end of the day, you're still in the SM instead of having the possibility of a new, improved and sexually fulfilling relationship.
I've learned that the hard way and I'm working on my exit plan. Here's the reality: I will NOT have sex in 2019 if I stay with my refuser. I MAY or CAN have sex and a possible wonderful relationship if I leave this marriage in 2019.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 1, 2019 0:49:20 GMT -5
solodriver, I feel like yours is the story to watch in 2019. Cheering you on from the sidelines! And admiring your courage and resolve to work your exit plan. You got this fella!!
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Post by solodriver on Jan 1, 2019 4:52:57 GMT -5
Thanks elle, tonight just confirmed it more than ever. But at midnight a few tears were shed.
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Post by carl on Jan 1, 2019 12:00:53 GMT -5
michael. I don’t think dating sites would work because think about it what woman would want to go on a date with a married guy. I can’t think of anyone and if I put myself in a woman’s position I wouldn’t want to. If a woman is on a dating site I imagine she would want to meet a single guy. Equally a married woman generally speaking as far as I can think would feel very uncomfortable meeting a guy with the prospect of there being any kind of sexual motive. I am not a woman but as far as I can think that would feel very unsettling. It doesn’t seem right or fair but I think these are the facts. Whether that’s right like I said I can’t say. Hence the sexless marriage situation. And that’s why a sexless marriage is so fucked up whether you are a man or a woman. Because marriage has all the right structure for having sex comfortably, without any worry or stress. The odds of you finding a sexual partner whilst you are married are very low. Hence the exit strategy, divorce and the law. ice cream sounds good though. Can’t see how that could be seen as cheating. I would go for ice cream with a friend - wouldn’t bother me what anyone thought.
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