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Post by JMX on Jul 27, 2018 22:42:21 GMT -5
I work in new construction. I help people build their dream homes. I am - a fucking psychologist. In walks a lady. Sweet. Plain. Super concerned about her furniture. It’s “mission style”. I mention this because she reminds me of it constantly. I don’t necessarily begrudge her furniture choices, but really - a silly google search and this is the second picture I found: She is so married to her furniture that I have had to work with her on numerous occasions to make sure that furniture fits x,y,z wall. Man, this house will be covered up with crap furniture. Her Realtor mouthed to me: “her furniture is crap”. Which, she didn’t need to do, I can surmise this is true just from meeting her. But she is holding on to it come HELL or high water. She will make sure every piece fits in her new house, damn it!!! Backing up - her husband took a job in Ohio and she thought she was following him. He filed for divorce instead and she seems completely railroaded by it. Zip code therapy I presume. I feel sympathy for her. She built a life. She built a life around her mission furniture. She wants to keep it and have a place for it all. He seems fine with leaving everything. She laments about the grandfather clock. He may take it, he may not. I suggested it be placed catacorner - in a place visible from the dining room and living room. She wants to put it flush against the wall. She wants to put all furniture flush against the wall. (Shrug, I tried) While she was measuring her office desk on the wall - I reminded her this was her new life. “I know this wall is short. How about you buy a desk just for you? To fit this space? It will be your new beginning. It’s just you.” “No. I couldn’t do that.” And then she got a little misty-eyed and went far-away. She is in total chaos. She has said she cannot believe her StBX hasn’t yet bought a house. My guess is he is tired. She is unable to move or change in chaos. In the south we say, “bless her heart”. Indeed, bless her heart.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 28, 2018 8:18:33 GMT -5
Bless her heart indeed. My Midwestern grandma used to use that phrase all the time.
For some reason, I’ve never much cared for Mission style. It seems uptight. A bit as you describe this woman. I wonder if, when we can’t or don’t attach to people, we attach to things instead?
If this is all she’s got though, God bless you for making sure it all fits. She’s going to need that furniture to keep her warm at night if it’s all she has. Sad.
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Post by greatcoastal on Jul 28, 2018 8:39:36 GMT -5
To start with ,I know too much about mission, stickley craftsman style furnishings! I also learned far too much about Queen Anne Victorian architecture, the Craftsman style bungalow of the 1920's, and Sears catalogue homes.
It becomes a slippery slope of idol worship. I gave up all of that. It's not important anymore.
Life is so much more fulfilling when I focus on giving and receiving, by investing my thoughts and actions in people and Gods creations.
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Post by baza on Jul 28, 2018 9:19:27 GMT -5
I suspect that the furniture is not the point here. But on reading this I was prompted to have a look around our house at our furniture out of idle curiosity. There is not even one item that Ms enna and I have purchased 'new' or in a particular style. To my eye it has a balance to it It's minimilist and functional....it's a small house, but with a big entertaining area / man cave that can easily accomodate a party. We like it.
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Post by elkclan2 on Jul 28, 2018 9:35:35 GMT -5
I like mission style ok, I guess. Although we've just disassembled my old futon sofa that's pretty much mission style to prep my house for sale and we've had three goes at reassembling it in his house and failed three times. I want to cry every time I think about it. I want to burn it. I do not want to move it again. That thing is HEAVY.
My partner and I have bought two pieces of furniture together already and we don't even live together yet (officially). We bought 8 dining chairs that we spotted at a second hand place while driving by. They aren't what I would have picked out if money were no object, but they are solid oak and should last us through the lads' teenage years easily and beyond. it's really hard to tip back in them!! We also bought an oversized, deep red leather sofa - must have cost thousands new. We spotted it on ebay and even though we didn't need it and it was a bitch to move, we both really wanted to fuck on it. Turns out it's also a really comfy sofa that looks great.
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Post by flounder on Jul 28, 2018 10:54:21 GMT -5
I too work in construction. Have for the last 23 years. People can be extremely finicky.
Excellent analogy here. Sometimes change IS painful.
As far as furniture goes,I don’t really give a shit as long as it’s comfortable and not overly tacky.
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Post by ironhamster on Jul 28, 2018 13:55:16 GMT -5
I'm ok with it, whatever her style is. It is definitely distinct in its plainness. At least it matches.
Playing Tetris to make it all fit is not anything I want to do, unless it is to fit everything into a moving truck. I like having some open space.
Stability. She wants nothing new, and wants to hold onto everything. There is a mindset there. I told my wife what I intended to take, and it wasn't much. All my worldly possessions fit in a 15 foot Uhaul. Some furniture was stored unwanted and unused in the garage before I packed it, with her protests that, while I told her I was taking it she never said I could take it. Dayum. The whole house was full of crap. She should have been thanking me for giving her more space. Stability. I guess some find solace in having as little change as possible.
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Post by flounder on Jul 28, 2018 15:33:06 GMT -5
We also bought an oversized, deep red leather sofa - must have cost thousands new. We spotted it on ebay and even though we didn't need it and it was a bitch to move, we both really wanted to fuck on it. -elkclan2
You know you are in a good relationship if you buy furniture just because you want to fuck on it . Good for you !
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Post by choosinghappy on Jul 29, 2018 7:47:33 GMT -5
This poor woman is going to have some tough lessons to learn. ☹️
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Post by h on Jul 29, 2018 14:57:09 GMT -5
We haven't bought a single stick of furniture in our house. Everything was gifts or hand-me-downs when one of our parents or siblings upgraded.
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Post by elkclan2 on Jul 30, 2018 3:12:49 GMT -5
We haven't bought a single stick of furniture in our house. Everything was gifts or hand-me-downs when one of our parents or siblings upgraded. I've had to buy most of my furniture, as there's no one to hand it down really living so far from my family. But I don't think I'll ever buy any brand new furniture again - except for mattresses. IMO waste of money. When we get our new home it will be entirely furnished with second hand stuff. But my personal taste preference is fab funky rather than matchy-matchy.
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Post by elkclan2 on Jul 30, 2018 3:16:05 GMT -5
We also bought an oversized, deep red leather sofa - must have cost thousands new. We spotted it on ebay and even though we didn't need it and it was a bitch to move, we both really wanted to fuck on it. -elkclan2 You know you are in a good relationship if you buy furniture just because you want to fuck on it . Good for you ! Well - it would have been worth it, cheaper than sleazebag motel or a public nuisance fine. :-) It was only £32 (about 50 bucks). And it's actually really lovely and really comfy! It's in my front room now and will go in our new house.
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Post by flounder on Jul 30, 2018 5:32:56 GMT -5
We also bought an oversized, deep red leather sofa - must have cost thousands new. We spotted it on ebay and even though we didn't need it and it was a bitch to move, we both really wanted to fuck on it. -elkclan2 You know you are in a good relationship if you buy furniture just because you want to fuck on it . Good for you ! Well - it would have been worth it, cheaper than sleazebag motel or a public nuisance fine. :-) It was only £32 (about 50 bucks). And it's actually really lovely and really comfy! It's in my front room now and will go in our new house. Just don’t tell your visitors !
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Post by Dan on Jul 30, 2018 6:58:25 GMT -5
Well - [the red leather couch] would have been worth it, cheaper than sleazebag motel or a public nuisance fine. :-) Why choose? I'd bet your life would be enriched if you had all three: a) a new-used red leather couch, b) a few nights in a sleazebag motel, c) a public nuisance fine (or two) to mention to your friends in passing... Note: "public indecency" is not defined by where the indecency took place. Rather, if you can be seen "being indecent" from a public place, you could get fined. My point being: if you position your red couch in your living room in front of a window into which someone on the street could see you going at it, you could kill two birds with one... fuck. Now: take the couch with you to a sleazy motel, then do it with the door open... and -- voila -- a perfect sex-trifecta!
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Post by h on Jul 30, 2018 23:00:19 GMT -5
We haven't bought a single stick of furniture in our house. Everything was gifts or hand-me-downs when one of our parents or siblings upgraded. I've had to buy most of my furniture, as there's no one to hand it down really living so far from my family. But I don't think I'll ever buy any brand new furniture again - except for mattresses. IMO waste of money. When we get our new home it will be entirely furnished with second hand stuff. But my personal taste preference is fab funky rather than matchy-matchy. My personal taste preference is functioning properly and as cheap as possible. Our first furniture in our first apartment was bought at the local volunteer fire department fundraising auction. A couch and loveseat for $100. They needed to be shampooed because whoever donated them to the auction must have spilled things all over them but for starting out, they worked. Kept those from college and just got rid of them last year when we got her parents' old stuff which was much nicer.
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