This article may hit home for others in one, or many areas.
For me, it confirms my choice of divorcing . It was necessary to separate in order to have a voice. Had I remained, the only voice would have been my controlling, helicopter mom ex. Especially as we are entering the middle and peak of the teen years. I can imagine my teens thinking (well my parents this... and my parents that...) when in reality it was/is my controlling, ex spouce.
I did not want to wait until I was dead, or when they had their own children for them to learn, ("dad wasn't like that, that was all mom"- or the reversal as is true in many other couples)
Daily when my teens are with me, I find myself giving them a lot more freedom, and more distant guidance than what they receive/received when at their mother's house.
For now ,it is such an improvement to be able to offer an alternative, and it helps me to find and be my true self again.
Here's to years ahead, and an alternative lifestyle for everyone!
This is so true. My oldest is starting college this year and I am at constant odds with my W because she can't lay off and let him learn basic lessons for him self. Also my 14 year old is catching more and more anger as she looses control over the oldest.
Both of my kids have had conversations with me about her being overbearing and they appreciate me standing up for them or being an ear that doesn't judge. They will tell me anything and withhold as much as possible from her.
She is a great mom don't get me wrong but she can helicopter....
You are doing a great job and being consistent and loving will bring you a better relationship. Much of you kids following her is out of fear and co-dependency. You watch the future will tell.
This the "Shoutbox" -- basically a site-wide, group chat. (It's only visible to members.)
petrushka: I was gobsmacked when I heard. This is just not us. In all of 2017 we had 37 murders in the country ..... I think the echo chambers of "social media" have a lot to answer for.
Mar 15, 2019 18:45:45 GMT -5
baza: Feeling for our Brothers and Sisters across the ditch Brother petrushka .
Mar 15, 2019 19:27:50 GMT -5
misssunnybunny: petrushka, I thought I read the headline wrong (this stuff happens here, not in NZ). It is frightening the hate that is being spread; it makes my heart hurt.
Mar 15, 2019 20:46:54 GMT -5
saarinista: All of us, IMHO, should try to be civil and kind as much as possible in person and online. I actively Tweet (civilly) on political matters and am horrified by the rancor & trolling on both sides of the spectrum, which only inflames unstable people.
Mar 19, 2019 23:21:20 GMT -5
saarinista: is anyone else watching March Madness?
Mar 24, 2019 11:44:48 GMT -5
worksforme2: doesn't much look like it...
Mar 27, 2019 12:20:10 GMT -5
saarinista: Well, my team is going to the Final Four! I am beyond thrilled. Basketball is life.
Apr 1, 2019 0:47:14 GMT -5
misssunnybunny: Congrats! Yay! I don't know how many people see the shout box, I don't think it shows up not he mobile version of the site. Maybe post something in the Off Topic section and more folks may see it?
Apr 1, 2019 15:38:34 GMT -5
wewbwb: Or, maybe baseball season started . . .
Apr 2, 2019 5:27:34 GMT -5
flashjohn: saarinista, my alma mater, Texas Tech, is also in the final four.
Apr 3, 2019 14:59:01 GMT -5
saarinista: : flashjohn Ruh, roh. Then we have to be mortal enemies for the weekend because I went to MSU!
Apr 4, 2019 16:09:20 GMT -5
worksforme2: The add attachment says a max of 1mb...I see plenty of videos that are way longer than that...how do I do that? My video is 4.97 mbs
Apr 25, 2019 20:10:25 GMT -5
h: The videos posted aren't attached. They are links to videos outside the site.
Apr 26, 2019 14:09:04 GMT -5
sexlessinga: Hi guys just joined
May 10, 2019 20:49:28 GMT -5
worksforme2: @mslowmaintenance….long time no see, welcome back...
May 29, 2019 9:30:25 GMT -5
noregretz: You can never outrun a Grizzly bear, but that's ok. You only have to outrun the person you're with....
Jun 15, 2019 12:28:09 GMT -5
solodriver: or in this case your refuser.
Jun 16, 2019 19:21:47 GMT -5