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Post by choosinghappy on Jul 19, 2018 13:42:10 GMT -5
Update:
I bought a condo today :-D
It's quicker than I expected to but it has almost every single thing I wanted in a new, smaller home, and in the exact location I wanted. It's all happening fast but I have the money and I have no doubts about my future moving in the right direction so, what am I waiting for?! I couldn't pass it up. Signed the P&S today, paid the deposit, booked the home inspector, found a closing attorney and am just keeping my fingers crossed all works out.
I'm just full of smiles about it all. How does the saying go?: The greater the storm the brighter the rainbow? I feel like I'm now starting to enjoy the rainbow.
I've been busy clearing out the clutter from our current home and will now be kicking it into high gear so we can get this house on the market.
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Post by northstarmom on Jul 19, 2018 15:08:47 GMT -5
Congrats, LW! Do change your name here. CreatingMyHappiness could be a possibility....
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Post by beachguy on Jul 19, 2018 15:35:12 GMT -5
Congratulations Lonelywifey (no more)!!!
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Post by baza on Jul 19, 2018 23:40:31 GMT -5
Great news Sister choosinghappy . It is very interesting how the making of one major choice concerning your longer term best interests seems to energise one into making further choices in ones best longer term interests as well.
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Post by shamwow on Jul 20, 2018 6:25:51 GMT -5
Update: I bought a condo today :-D It's quicker than I expected to but it has almost every single thing I wanted in a new, smaller home, and in the exact location I wanted. It's all happening fast but I have the money and I have no doubts about my future moving in the right direction so, what am I waiting for?! I couldn't pass it up. Signed the P&S today, paid the deposit, booked the home inspector, found a closing attorney and am just keeping my fingers crossed all works out. I'm just full of smiles about it all. How does the saying go?: The greater the storm the brighter the rainbow? I feel like I'm now starting to enjoy the rainbow. I've been busy clearing out the clutter from our current home and will now be kicking it into high gear so we can get this house on the market. Congrats! When do you close?
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Post by time4intimacy on Jul 20, 2018 15:04:07 GMT -5
Update: I bought a condo today :-D It's quicker than I expected to but it has almost every single thing I wanted in a new, smaller home, and in the exact location I wanted. It's all happening fast but I have the money and I have no doubts about my future moving in the right direction so, what am I waiting for?! I couldn't pass it up. Signed the P&S today, paid the deposit, booked the home inspector, found a closing attorney and am just keeping my fingers crossed all works out. I'm just full of smiles about it all. How does the saying go?: The greater the storm the brighter the rainbow? I feel like I'm now starting to enjoy the rainbow. I've been busy clearing out the clutter from our current home and will now be kicking it into high gear so we can get this house on the market. Congrats lonelywifey I love how focused, organized and logical you have been through this entire process. Enjoy the new condo.
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Post by choosinghappy on Jul 20, 2018 15:09:21 GMT -5
Update: I bought a condo today :-D It's quicker than I expected to but it has almost every single thing I wanted in a new, smaller home, and in the exact location I wanted. It's all happening fast but I have the money and I have no doubts about my future moving in the right direction so, what am I waiting for?! I couldn't pass it up. Signed the P&S today, paid the deposit, booked the home inspector, found a closing attorney and am just keeping my fingers crossed all works out. I'm just full of smiles about it all. How does the saying go?: The greater the storm the brighter the rainbow? I feel like I'm now starting to enjoy the rainbow. I've been busy clearing out the clutter from our current home and will now be kicking it into high gear so we can get this house on the market. Congrats! When do you close? Soon!! 3 weeks š
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Post by choosinghappy on Jul 20, 2018 15:11:00 GMT -5
Update: I bought a condo today :-D It's quicker than I expected to but it has almost every single thing I wanted in a new, smaller home, and in the exact location I wanted. It's all happening fast but I have the money and I have no doubts about my future moving in the right direction so, what am I waiting for?! I couldn't pass it up. Signed the P&S today, paid the deposit, booked the home inspector, found a closing attorney and am just keeping my fingers crossed all works out. I'm just full of smiles about it all. How does the saying go?: The greater the storm the brighter the rainbow? I feel like I'm now starting to enjoy the rainbow. I've been busy clearing out the clutter from our current home and will now be kicking it into high gear so we can get this house on the market. Congrats lonelywifey I love how focused, organized and logical you have been through this entire process. Enjoy the new condo. Thank you, thatās a really nice compliment š Donāt think I havenāt had some shitty, emotion-driven days in there too but overall things have been moving along nicely š
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Post by shamwow on Jul 20, 2018 17:12:36 GMT -5
Congrats! When do you close? Soon!! 3 weeks š Funny how you seem stuck in quicksand and then everything just seems to jump into warp speed, isn't it?
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Post by solodriver on Jul 21, 2018 1:53:03 GMT -5
Update: I bought a condo today :-D It's quicker than I expected to but it has almost every single thing I wanted in a new, smaller home, and in the exact location I wanted. It's all happening fast but I have the money and I have no doubts about my future moving in the right direction so, what am I waiting for?! I couldn't pass it up. Signed the P&S today, paid the deposit, booked the home inspector, found a closing attorney and am just keeping my fingers crossed all works out. I'm just full of smiles about it all. How does the saying go?: The greater the storm the brighter the rainbow? I feel like I'm now starting to enjoy the rainbow. I've been busy clearing out the clutter from our current home and will now be kicking it into high gear so we can get this house on the market. To quote you from several months ago:
"I think itās very important for those of us planning/contemplating getting out to read about the good experiences some of you are now having. Itās what I hope and will strive for. Keep telling your stories!!"
Thank you for sharing what is happening with you and keep us posted on everything that is happening with you.
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Post by solodriver on Aug 11, 2018 13:10:42 GMT -5
Congrats lonelywifey I love how focused, organized and logical you have been through this entire process. Enjoy the new condo. Thank you, thatās a really nice compliment š Donāt think I havenāt had some shitty, emotion-driven days in there too but overall things have been moving along nicely š Any new, exciting updates on your story?
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Post by choosinghappy on Aug 11, 2018 14:57:02 GMT -5
Update: Things have been moving at lightening speed around here. I closed on my new condo this past week and already have some contractors lined up for next week. Iāve been working my ass off to get my current house ready for sale and it was listed a few days ago with open houses happening this weekend. We already have 5 offers on it, all above asking price š So the home situation really couldnāt be better at this point.
As for my STBX, we are getting along well through all of this, mostly because heās been pretty hands-off. When he moved out at the beginning of July he kind of checked out and we immediately went into our new āseparationā mode. I have our young son most of the time but he takes him for one weekend day each wknd when his work schedule allows, and also tries to see him at least one weeknight as well. We havenāt done anything formal yet in regards to divorce because our time and energy has been completely taken up with other things so far. But we both agree we will plan to do a collaborative divorce. In the meantime we are still sharing finances which is working in my favor. He also offered to pay for all of the new flooring in my new place since Iām replacing it all and Iām frugal. He is not. So if he wants to pay for it and upgrade from what I had planned on, sure, Iāll let him!
Honestly, things in my life have been a complete whirlwind but ALL positive.
My special guy that I met on here is still...special š and we get together as often as we can while we both go through our divorces and big changes. It is not as often as either of us would like but when we can make it happen it is amazing. We know this is likely the most challenging time and hopefully within a couple months weāll both be in a better place with some more flexibility. But itās been wonderful to have each other for support.
All good things!!
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Post by solodriver on Aug 11, 2018 15:22:49 GMT -5
Update: Things have been moving at lightening speed around here. I closed on my new condo this past week and already have some contractors lined up for next week. Iāve been working my ass off to get my current house ready for sale and it was listed a few days ago with open houses happening this weekend. We already have 5 offers on it, all above asking price š So the home situation really couldnāt be better at this point. As for my STBX, we are getting along well through all of this, mostly because heās been pretty hands-off. When he moved out at the beginning of July he kind of checked out and we immediately went into our new āseparationā mode. I have our young son most of the time but he takes him for one weekend day each wknd when his work schedule allows, and also tries to see him at least one weeknight as well. We havenāt done anything formal yet in regards to divorce because our time and energy has been completely taken up with other things so far. But we both agree we will plan to do a collaborative divorce. In the meantime we are still sharing finances which is working in my favor. He also offered to pay for all of the new flooring in my new place since Iām replacing it all and Iām frugal. He is not. So if he wants to pay for it and upgrade from what I had planned on, sure, Iāll let him! Honestly, things in my life have been a complete whirlwind but ALL positive. My special guy that I met on here is still...special š and we get together as often as we can while we both go through our divorces and big changes. It is not as often as either of us would like but when we can make it happen it is amazing. We know this is likely the most challenging time and hopefully within a couple months weāll both be in a better place with some more flexibility. But itās been wonderful to have each other for support. All good things!! I'm very happy for you choosinghappy. I'm coming down the path behind you so your story is encouraging. I'm in the exit planning stage right now and it will probably be next summer before I leave, because I'm trying to put our finances in better shape to support what will have to happen, which it can't right now. But in the mean time I'm doing the best I can to keep my self together. I figure that I've lived 19 years like this, I can do 1 more so that I can make things as easy for myself as I can. It will still be a very tough trip through it but it at least can start to happen, which right now it just can't financially.
Last weekend when we had the DNS problems on here, I got very worried we might not ever get back on here and it actually scared me. I depend on this site and all my friends to get me through day by day. I'm sure glad the Admin folks were able to get it back up. I realized I don't have anyone's email or anything outside of here. It would be a very hard thing for me if we lost this site.
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Post by time4intimacy on Aug 14, 2018 4:45:24 GMT -5
Update: Things have been moving at lightening speed around here. I closed on my new condo this past week and already have some contractors lined up for next week. Iāve been working my ass off to get my current house ready for sale and it was listed a few days ago with open houses happening this weekend. We already have 5 offers on it, all above asking price š So the home situation really couldnāt be better at this point. As for my STBX, we are getting along well through all of this, mostly because heās been pretty hands-off. When he moved out at the beginning of July he kind of checked out and we immediately went into our new āseparationā mode. I have our young son most of the time but he takes him for one weekend day each wknd when his work schedule allows, and also tries to see him at least one weeknight as well. We havenāt done anything formal yet in regards to divorce because our time and energy has been completely taken up with other things so far. But we both agree we will plan to do a collaborative divorce. In the meantime we are still sharing finances which is working in my favor. He also offered to pay for all of the new flooring in my new place since Iām replacing it all and Iām frugal. He is not. So if he wants to pay for it and upgrade from what I had planned on, sure, Iāll let him! Honestly, things in my life have been a complete whirlwind but ALL positive. My special guy that I met on here is still...special š and we get together as often as we can while we both go through our divorces and big changes. It is not as often as either of us would like but when we can make it happen it is amazing. We know this is likely the most challenging time and hopefully within a couple months weāll both be in a better place with some more flexibility. But itās been wonderful to have each other for support. All good things!! Sounds like it is all under control and you are getting some fun when you can. I am glad you are happy. With the divorce, you never know if the STBX is going to have a change of heart on being cooperative. I would move to divorce sooner than later before he decides to change his mind on being cooperative. It appears to me your STBX lacks a man card.
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Post by choosinghappy on Aug 18, 2018 10:46:14 GMT -5
One week later.
We went under contract after our open house weekend and accepted a cash offer on our home that was way over asking. We close in TWO WEEKS. So I am now a crazy person trying to get as much done in my new house as possible before I move in on the 28th - replacing almost all flooring, paint throughout, and I'm accepting that the kitchen redo will have to wait until we're in. I'm also packing up my current home in the meantime while I attempt to keep my 3 year old son out of the way and entertained because his daycare is closed for vacation during these two weeks. Worst possible timing. My life is currently a shitshow. But it's all for good reasons.
I'm exhausted but I'm happy.
I daydream about when I'm settled in my new place (MY new place!) surrounded by everything exactly how I want it, not having to deal with the underlying tension and unspoken discontent in every interaction. And I actually am loving the fact that I am downsizing and moving to a place that feels more my speed. My STBX is VP of his company. He is a head honcho and he acts like it. We had the big house and the fancy cars and too much STUFF. This life with him never quite felt right for me. Sure, things were always EASY but that didn't mean I was happy. I like the idea of my new life that feels more like me, like what I want, and also like how I want to raise my son. He'll have the rich dad to buy him anything he wants and take him on exotic vacations and then he'll have me: not so rich money-wise but I'll more than make up for it in love, affection, and fun. I'll be his grounding and his comfort. (I already am.) I am definitely okay with that.
Please wish me luck with this current whirlwind of activity that I'm in! The next 10 days will continue to be a big push towards the finish. I'm looking forward to being settled and moving forward with my life.
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