|
Post by northstarmom on Oct 17, 2017 10:33:32 GMT -5
"Negative. She's moderately religious and a regular church goer. Hitting on a married guy would be an absolute no go for her and her sleeping with a married guy isn't even conceivable."
I don't know whether she was hitting on you but I would bet that whether or not she plans to or wants to fuck you, she thinks you are attractive and appealing enough to get sex from your wife for more than religious reasons. If she thought you needed to change your behavior or hygiene to get sex from your wife, she would have said so.
I also know regular church goers who have affairs. This includes a cross wearing acquaintance who goes to church regularly who was in the process of divorcing her third husband, was having sex with a boyfriend while trying to have sex with another guy.
Hell, there are priests and married ministers who have active extramarital sex lived so don't assume that being Christian or religious prevents people from fucking around or fantasizing about doing that.
"Good" girls and boys do have sex including sex considered to be sinful.
|
|
|
Post by hopingforachange on Oct 17, 2017 10:48:15 GMT -5
Let's just say, I have known of a few men of the cloth having affairs in the church. Specificaly one that was cought ontop of the Organ.
|
|
|
Post by h on Oct 17, 2017 11:24:56 GMT -5
Let's just say, I have known of a few men of the cloth having affairs in the church. Specificaly one that was cought ontop of the Organ. Wouldn't that be someone on HIS organ? 😂
|
|
|
Post by hopingforachange on Oct 17, 2017 11:29:20 GMT -5
Let's just say, I have known of a few men of the cloth having affairs in the church. Specificaly one that was cought ontop of the Organ. Wouldn't that be someone on HIS organ? 😂 If I remember the story right. It was the organist on his organ on the organ. Or it might have been the organist on the organ with his organ. 😄🤣
|
|
|
Post by iceman on Oct 17, 2017 14:14:36 GMT -5
Negative. She's moderately religious and a regular church goer. Hitting on a married guy would be an absolute no go for her and her sleeping with a married guy isn't even conceivable. I believe you should go easier on my new friend h, h. Lots of people here like him, respect him, and enjoy his company in this forum. He's fully likeable, and desirable to women, just not that particular woman that's in the center of the sexual maelstrom. I see in you a problem we share. Shame. Our wives think we suck, so it must be true, so we denigrate ourselves preemptively hoping that will dissuade others from thinking we suck. It is a defence, in my case anyway, that keeps me from going nuts. The sad part is that while I always thought myself to be a good husband I do suck now as a husband. I make no effort to be a good husband. Good father? Absolutely. Good husband? I don't care if I am or not. It makes no difference either way. I didn't wake up one day and think I'm going to start being a bad husband. I just quit trying at some point.
|
|
|
Post by hopingforachange on Oct 17, 2017 16:31:59 GMT -5
I believe you should go easier on my new friend h, h. Lots of people here like him, respect him, and enjoy his company in this forum. He's fully likeable, and desirable to women, just not that particular woman that's in the center of the sexual maelstrom. I see in you a problem we share. Shame. Our wives think we suck, so it must be true, so we denigrate ourselves preemptively hoping that will dissuade others from thinking we suck. It is a defence, in my case anyway, that keeps me from going nuts. The sad part is that while I always thought myself to be a good husband I do suck now as a husband. I make no effort to be a good husband. Good father? Absolutely. Good husband? I don't care if I am or not. It makes no difference either way. I didn't wake up one day and think I'm going to start being a bad husband. I just quit trying at some point. Yep, I tried for the longest time to be a better husband, thinking I had to be just a little bit better and I will get sex, intimacy and the love I need. The closer I get to my deadline, the less I'm caring.
|
|
|
Post by M2G on Oct 17, 2017 22:37:49 GMT -5
Yeah I hear that. I can live with civility. Heroic measures mean nothing and I'm sick of the "chutes and ladders" secret sex deprivation game.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Oct 19, 2017 14:08:39 GMT -5
I’d bet money she’s hitting on you. Or wants to. Negative. She's moderately religious and a regular church goer. Hitting on a married guy would be an absolute no go for her and her sleeping with a married guy isn't even conceivable. Some (not all) prissy women secretly want to be sexy women. Since they don’t quite have the nerve, they flaunt their prissiness and use their position as “respectable wife, pillar of the community” to look down on women like me. The truth is, they would probably do it if they thought they could get away with it.
|
|
|
Post by hopingforachange on Oct 19, 2017 14:38:32 GMT -5
@smartkat
Like how it's been reciently reported on the news, those that are the most against something are those with the skeletons in the closet.
Prefect example, Congressman Tim Murphy pressuring his Mistress to get an abortion before she even was able to confirm the pregnancy.
|
|
|
Post by h on Oct 22, 2017 10:48:42 GMT -5
Update on the friend: she was asking me about advice for how to take her new man's seemingly odd "typical guy" behavior. He's not very different from me personality-wise so she needed a little behavioral translation and explanation. She seemed baffled why he would want to spend time alone at his recreational activities instead of with her (not all the time but often). I assured her that he wasn't avoiding her and just needed some relaxation time. The friend had been through some tough relationships and is learning how to trust again. Her new guy has been hurt before too and is hesitant to open up more.
She joked with me that I had to work on her guy and in turn, she would work on my W. I opened up a little more and told her she could try but there wasn't much point since I didn't think my W would ever change. I don't think she knew that it had always been like this. She was very sympathetic when I told her it had been this way from the start. I told her she could try but that we would likely end up divorced eventually.
All of this was through texting. My W asked what we were talking about and I told her the truth minus a few specific details. I told her that her friend needed guy advice and that if I helped her with him, she would help me with my W. W was visibly upset by the thought that I was talking to outsiders about our SM. It turned into a huge argument later last night. She proceeded to blame me for not fulfilling her emotional needs and that's why she isn't interested in sex. I called bullshit on her because it's been this way from the beginning and I can't continue to meet her needs if she's going to refuse to meet mine. I bluntly told her that if nothing changes then this is never going to work out. She slept on the couch last night.
|
|
|
Post by northstarmom on Oct 22, 2017 11:43:39 GMT -5
"Some (not all) prissy women secretly want to be sexy women. Since they don’t quite have the nerve, they flaunt their prissiness and use their position as “respectable wife, pillar of the community” to look down on women like me. The truth is, they would probably do it if they thought they could get away with it."
Some such women are happy to accept expensive gifts from men they date, have their rent or tuition paid by the men, travel and even sleep in the same bed with the men but allege to be too religious to have sex with the men. I worked with such a woman who bragged about the financial support her boyfriend gave her. She alleged religion kept her celibate. Later it slipped out that since her hysterectomy, she had no sex drive.
|
|
|
Post by workingonit on Oct 22, 2017 13:29:22 GMT -5
Update on the friend: she was asking me about advice for how to take her new man's seemingly odd "typical guy" behavior. He's not very different from me personality-wise so she needed a little behavioral translation and explanation. She seemed baffled why he would want to spend time alone at his recreational activities instead of with her (not all the time but often). I assured her that he wasn't avoiding her and just needed some relaxation time. The friend had been through some tough relationships and is learning how to trust again. Her new guy has been hurt before too and is hesitant to open up more. She joked with me that I had to work on her guy and in turn, she would work on my W. I opened up a little more and told her she could try but there wasn't much point since I didn't think my W would ever change. I don't think she knew that it had always been like this. She was very sympathetic when I told her it had been this way from the start. I told her she could try but that we would likely end up divorced eventually. All of this was through texting. My W asked what we were talking about and I told her the truth minus a few specific details. I told her that her friend needed guy advice and that if I helped her with him, she would help me with my W. W was visibly upset by the thought that I was talking to outsiders about our SM. It turned into a huge argument later last night. She proceeded to blame me for not fulfilling her emotional needs and that's why she isn't interested in sex. I called bullshit on her because it's been this way from the beginning and I can't continue to meet her needs if she's going to refuse to meet mine. I bluntly told her that if nothing changes then this is never going to work out. She slept on the couch last night. Wow h! That is MOVEMENT. I know it probably felt bad but you should feel great that you held your ground. She is getting how serious this is too. Well done!
|
|
|
Post by northstarmom on Oct 22, 2017 17:00:52 GMT -5
The major movement that has occurred is you are now living your truth not covering up your sm by acting as if all is fine. It will not change your wife but will change you as you see happening.
|
|
|
Post by baza on Oct 22, 2017 18:24:13 GMT -5
I reckon that your "best case scenario" here is that your missus might drop her external act that everything is great.
It's highly unlikely that it will shift her core beliefs by one iota, but she might become a bit more selective about "who" she puts the act on for. Presumably, this mutual friend won't be one of them any more, and it will probably be strongly suggested to you that this mutual friend ought not be your confidante any longer.
|
|
|
Post by greatcoastal on Oct 22, 2017 18:49:54 GMT -5
@smartkat Like how it's been reciently reported on the news, those that are the most against something are those with the skeletons in the closet. Prefect example, Congressman Tim Murphy pressuring his Mistress to get an abortion before she even was able to confirm the pregnancy. Speaking of skeletons, do you know why skeletons don't play music in their church? Because, they have no organs!
|
|